CecilBGreen
Status: lots on my mind
Mood:
Ok
Offline
- I have been in a rough patch the last couple of weeks. At my last therapy session a lot of emotions and memories came out. I also admitted that I was thinking daily about suicide. I told him I didn't think the medication I am on is working. Pdoc is...
- I have read that porno is used to groom boys for sexual abuse. It was used with me and I am a female. i am wondering if other women were groomed with pornography. In my case it was used to not only show me what a penis was like but how sex was a...
- Another journal copy. This one is an honest to goodness question/issue not just a vent. I am open to any opinions/suggestions etc. I keep doing the same thing over and over (sigh)I wish I knew the answer to that. I beat myself up for not getting out...
- ....or I should say "myself" since i don't know that others want or need re-parenting. I need so much love and reassurance that no one will ever be able to provide enough. I try to find it through food (which is killing me) I weigh a LOT...I'm...
- So...I sometimes put things here that are from my journal. My journal is mostly so I can look back and see if there are any patterns, progress or regressions. This is from my journal. Sorry I am being so long winded these days.Between the Eating...
- Sorry about this being so random. I suppose there other groups that would be more appropriate but I know people here and value all of your thoughts and opinions.It is not easy making new friends in middle age. (I am almost 49) I am very close to 3...
- I may have mentioned that when I first open my eyes in the morning I feel like crying. I have some sort of intense emotional pain. Lately I have not been sleeping well. I feel like it is a light sleep and I will periodically feel that deep emotional...
- We have some very talented people in this group so I thought it would be nice to have a thread where we can share our work. Anything and everything is welcome.PaintingDrawingDoodlingKnittingMusic/Singing/playingPoetryPhotographySculptureFiber...
- I am having the strangest emotional feelings. They are like flashbacks but not visual and no panic.I feel like I used to when I was 11 , maybe 12 years old. Emotionally I am right back there and there are visual flickers but not enough to recognize....
- I know this is probably pointing out/just realizing the obvious but here goes.I am lonely. It was one of the first things tdoc said to me almost a year ago. He said,"I think you are lonely". Of course I said, "Oh, maybe a little but not really. I...
- I told him I often slip into a fantasy world , usually when I am unhappy. I always knew the difference between fantasy and reality but once after my husband died the lines got blurred. They got blurred in large part because a man and his children...
- I decided on the indirect approach. ( Ha...decided...haha...wussed out it more like it) I told him how I felt the same way about him that I felt about my brother and his friend. I loved them but was afraid of them. He asked how it was like how I...
- I am not angry at my childhood abusers, one of which was my brother. I loved my brother so much. He seemed to love me. He played with me, he was kind and gentle with me. Ultimately he betrayed me and hurt me so badly.I should hate him. I should be...
- OK...I know I obsess on this and I wish I didn't. It is so painful for me.I have been seeing my therapist for a year. I love him. I think I am attracted to him but I may be different in the respect that I find it impossible to have sexual fantasies...
- I am having a horrible day. Yesterday I was on top of the world or at least pretty high up. Today I am watching suicide videos. It is no secret that I daydream about dying but have no follow through or serious attempts so not to worry.Sometimes I...