malibumark

My mother passed away in 1996. I celebrate Mother's Day with my Stepmom, and all my relatives who are mothers.I woke up this morning and my mood started amping up a great deal. Then I suddenly drew...

my therapist brought up my mother today. Since Mother's Day is approaching.She really seems to want to upset the apple cart. I do why she brought her up.All I know is that it made me start to obsess...

sometimes there doesn't seem to be a safe place to beexcept for not reaching out and cocooning in your own home.I bought a bottle of wine and some blue tortilla chips and salsa.That's tomorrow's...

keeping it managed.Before I went to yoga today I was feeling suicidal. I really felt like therelike I was in darkness and it was me - I decided to go to yoga class as I thought it might reset my...

I am home from the office and I went for a walk to the coffee shop.Then I came back and plopped in front of the tely - and had a bowl ofcereal. Thinking about the future, thinking about my next...

i sit here and watch tv and feel ultimately like my life isn't that great or worth much...but i'd like it to be like the lives I see on tv.. I am watching Bloomberg Technology newsand it seems to be...

I realized yesterday that getting down to doing a job like housework involves dealingwith the chaos of it at first - everyone has to deal with it - and it is something to just accept  earlier...

I may be able to understand things sometimes but it's like something in my mind can never be satisfied.I try and understand it - but I can never keep busy enough and then I have to stop and rest -...

I came home from work yesterday and sat myself in front of the tv.I realized much of my impulse was to merge with a kind of all encompassing meaning and indulgence. It's like I wanted to be alone,...

I came home from work today, and rather than go to an event where my Dad, sister and Stepmom were,I decided to stay home. I did laundry, ate a meal, watched TV and drank some wine. I was tiredand...

It’s weird. It’s the end of the day. My mind is on work and have been watching the news unwinding and relaxing. I started to look back at the day and work and thought there wasn’t really much...

The past few days my mind has been going down rabbit holes looking out for ideas and understandings - nearly uncontrollablethoughts, well not a lot of control (which is frightening) and on top of...

I went to a Greek Easter party yesterday, and when I left they sent me home witha care package of food, including about 5 Lamb chops which could have lastedme a few days. LOL...nope! I ended up...

I had strange dreams last night, a common dream that I have that haunts me for some reason.I am with people from different stages in my life but for some reason I still have a project or projectsin...