malibumark

things are going well here. Starting to realize some folks interpret things more in terms of the aesthetic or the way of things and some focus more on the relationships at hand. It’s like that old...

I don't why, but I have so felt the need, the compulsion to justify myself and my life.It's made for some very dark and very wasted time in my life when I could have beenadventuring, creating and...

I'm in my cell now. With Blue. Radio on. Candle lit. Electric potbelly stove flickering and crackling away. I feel the pressure to know who I am, and I wonder the pressure we put on ourselves if the...

I’m having a manic episode today but it’s in check. Super amounts of enthusiasm and energy and feeling high flying in mood and reactive but fortunately I know how to keep a perspective on it....

Some other thoughts about this. I was thinking about how I need to subjugate myself to the monasteryactivities as in prayerful and solemn services, silence during meals and limited conversation with...

Marc, I’m having a beer. Life was feeling too austere.I thought about how it’s no coincidence that I live in a female monastery as chaplain. I usually had a lot of girl friends growing up, whom I...

plus your sense of relationships grows and expands as you need to negotiate and navigatelife in its full and dimensional form.. You focus more on practical things and pragmatic things - you like...

It's wild but, I realized today while in serviceand outside of service too - that I can't get too submissiveto the aesthetic of things I am involved with aka trying to fit inor being perfect...

Just need to keep in a zone and take the work one step at a time today. I know we all have to bide our time and patience towards walking ourselves through our work and alone time. Nobody's perfect...

i don't know how to wind down right now.I want to call my Dad to calm myselfbut I want to respect his space too.My friend is also notaround.After we spoke today with my therapistI had a good...

It's a quiet day of services and laundry here.I had the sense, when back in my cell/room, thateverything I was supposed to take care of was done,and everything that I could afford to do financially...

I am blessed with a handful of good friends and family.My illness make want to run to others for help. I have very supportive friends and family but I must be my own best friend to carry myself...

Are you afraid of relaxing and going for what you want?I've had to structure my life so carefully because of my condition that very much'pleasure' has taken a backseat in the realm of my survival....

I was in services this morning and I thought about how we each struggle daily in our lives.I felt the abrasiveness of my fellow altar worker and the others. I thoughtabout how they come to this...