Ellocin

I'm feeling good today overall.  I had to really think about it, but yes I do feel good at the moment.  I'm actually surprised because I got drunk last night but I'm not feeling any effects of it...

Not really sure how I feel anymore.  Mood wise I feel okay...but my thoughts are telling me another story.  The last week or so I've had almost continuatious thoughts and urges to do things I know...

It's been kind of a good day I guess.  I was planning on getting up for church but I just couldn't bring myself to get up.  I really was wiped out from yesterday I guess.  I ended up sleeping...

Had an overall great day today.  Started off a little rough since I was wide awake at 4:30am on barely any sleep.  Guess I didn't need to worry about sleeping in afterall...lol.  Left my place at...

Just wanted to write a quick check in but I'm tired so probably won't be much.  Tomorrow is my job shadow and I'm a little anxious about it but more about getting up at 5am then anything at this...

Doing better these days.  I still have thoughts and urges but they don't bother me so much.  I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and we talked about everything that has been going on since I saw her 3...

Just read what i wrote very early this morning before I went to bed.  Feeling better today I think I was just overtired and I did have a few drinks.  I like the spiderweb analogy though...not sure...

Just my newest weird writing...I’ve let everyone down and myself too many times.  I don’t know how to be human anymore.  I don’t know how to be around people and not bring my stupid past and...

I'm okay even though I'm gonna breakBreaking apart but I'm okay  

Still feeling like absolute crap but did get a load of laundry in.   Also called my psychiatrist and was just planning to leave a message to update her (she's been on vacation past 3 weeks) but she...

so i was fine for all of an hour and half, now i'm mad again.  Mom and I just got in an arguement and now I feel miserable all over again.  I am just so sick of this.  I really need strength just...

Yeah I'm still miserable but I got up off my butt and put dinner in the microwave even though I'm not hungry.  I think it's time of the month and stress thinking about the job shadow I have to do on...

This isn't good.  I slept at decent hours...well 2am until about noon today.  Woke up still in a horrible mood.  I feel like such a waste of space right now.  I keep thinking of how to end things...

just finished watching a movie...was alright tell like 5 min ago and now i don't know what my problem is...feel so alone and like i shouldn't be here...i can't shake that feeling...i'm so sick of...

So I didn't end up falling asleep until probably like 7:30am.  It's okay...I was happy to have that discussion last night and tonight I will take some meds to help me sleep.  I missed church, just...