Sierrawr6911

Couldn't sleep.. Stayed up watching netflix... I'm losing myself more and more each day... I cried for hours... I guess the show I watched really didn't help though..How am I supposed to get up to...

Suicidal thoughts get worse by the hour.... I've been crying off and on for the past 24 hours... Every time I think I'm good, it starts all over again.. breathing feels nearly impossible... I'm not...

A night full of panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. Gotta keep things interesting I guess.. Still extremely anxious and not doing too well.. Would be nice to have someone to talk to about things...

God, please give me strength to get through all of this..I'm not doing too well.. I wish I could talk to someone about everything going on in my head right now.. I mean, it's not that I can't.. I...

I cut tonight.... Typing those words.. I feel so disappointed... But.. I couldn't stop myself.. I feel like a failure...I look at my arm... And honestly.. I didn't want to stop when I did... I still...

Couldn't sleep, feel like I'm gonna vomit.. And I really don't want to go to the gym and meet the trainer today.. Something about working my ass off when I can barely move without nearly vomiting all...

I feel worthless.. It feels like I'm going no where.. No job, no money, no future..  I'm stuck here.. And it is really getting to me.. And then I feellike an overall shitty person.. Crappy...

Food is becoming my worst enemy... I have always loved food so much.. Eating became my way of coping... It couldn't hurt me, it couldn't judge me or make me feel so bad. It made me feel better.. Now...

I feel like I have no control of my emotions anymore.. I'm a ticking time bomb.. Waiting to explode.. I'm so scared that I won't be able to stay strong... Only because I don't want to hurt anyone......

I feel so worthless... Pathetic... like the world would be so much better without me.. I just cause problems... I hurt the people I care about... I upset the people I want so badly to make happy. I...

Well, I'm not feeling terrible.. Still a little off but, could be worse. Although.. Today, or yesterday I guess.. I felt so.. disgusting... I could barely look in the mirror.. I felt fat, ugly,...

Feeling a lil better, finally starting to get things going...  Slowly getting my life together a lil bit...  But... I feel so weird.. I'm trying soo hard to keep a positive attitude and to keep my...

So... Positive post for the day....It ended with skyping a cutie-patootie!! 

I think about death far too often... What happens to us after death? How does it feel to die? It's become more of an obsession lately. The curiosity drives me insane... Sometimes I'm not really even...

I've written plenty about why I don't want to be alive. And the reasons it'd be better if I were gone....  But I rarely, if ever, write about Why I should be alive and what makes living worth it.....