Levismommy

I'm always ok. I just have to remind myself of that. Maybe one day, i'll have the courage to be good, then great. This Sunday is the anniverasary of the day that I'll forver dispise. I'm aching just...

Levi will be dead a year on the 4th. Wow, what a year it's been! I never knew that losing someone was so hard. I watched my friends mourn over their s or family.I only saw the moment that they were...

I have recived far too much love and support, if that is EVEN possible! Thank you guys so much! The journal has helped me to just let go of some of the hurt and fear I face but hide. I have needed...

Today is a hard day. I don't feel much self pitty but I am worn down and scared. There's so much going on and i'm too tired to write about it all. Awww... I miss being a goofy kid with all of those...

I think that the pregnancy hormones often make me more sensitive, either that or I'm turning into a nasty witch. Seriously, I am at my end by noon nearly every day. I ask myself why and I have no...

When i became a mother to my first son, I was so young but all that I ever wanted was to keep him safe. I had nightmares of bad things happening to him and I cried at night as he slept wondering how...

The past just hurts. I don't feel self pitty, not really. I'm just really tired. For so long, i've tried to be superhuman. I wouldn't accept my weaknesses, I was determined to be strong. I wanted to...

I visited Levi today. the weather has been warmer,meening, 40 degrees or so. But, for us, that's warm so it's been nice. We're aproaching the aniversary of Levi's death in March. I'm nervous about...

Today has been a better day, my stress level is down a smidgen and my husband and I seem to be having more and more nicer days. Right after we had the twins, we really started to lose interest in...

I wonder if the problems ever stop. Besides Levi being gone, there have been so many other things to face for me and my family. I'm taking my ex husband to court to extinguish his parental rights...

I went to Levi's grave today, gosh, I hate that word, grave. i talked to him a little differently today and cried harder than I have visiting him in a while.The weather is cold, snow is on the...

I miss his little bumpy head and his sticky, slobbery kneck. He always smelt like milk. he was funny and soft and shy, he loved his daddy's baseball cap, he would stare at the bill and his eyes would...

Today is a tired day. Between family and preganany I am just wore out. Emotionally, I am fragile. I feel my spirit strengthening though, it seems when my heart is truly weak, my spirit grows.I...

We only live up the road from the cemetary that Levi's in but it doesn't bridge the distance or bring very much comfort. It's only his body, not his beutiful life that is up the road. Sometimes I...