Elandlu2
Status: 62 year old mom and grandmom. Trying to hold myself together
Mood:
Ok
Offline
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He emailed me the other day. It was odd--I had gotten the cell phone bill--the first one since the one we broke up over--the one that showed me just how much he was communicating with this other...
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I can cut the depression with a knife today. Or actually I wish I could, then I could have it in managable chunks. It's been almost 4 weeks, and if anything I feel worse than I did. Was hoping by now...
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Going over in my mind the last conversation we had before I left you. The one with me in the car and you standing outside. I don't even remember the whole thing, I was so angry, but snippets ....1....
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I really should. You took my love, my dreams, my hopes, my happiness, everything you meant to me, wadded it up and threw it in my face. I should despise you. I really should. God only knows why I...
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Trying not to think of youTrying not to wonder if you miss me, if you regret....Trying not to think of when we laughed togetherTrying not to wonder where you are, if you're with her...Trying not to...
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Didn't sleep well last night. Had trouble falling asleep, then had a dream about him and woke up with a lump in my chest. Didn't get back to sleep for a long time. Saw my dr. today and told her about...
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I'm once again doubting myself, and wondering if I did the right thing in breaking up with him. Maybe there was a way to work this out? I don't know, but today I'm feeling as though the best part of...
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Although I've already taken 6 days off over this breakup, I need one today. I need a day for me, to nurture myself, to bring organization back into my life. I am going for a reiki treatment...
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If anything I feel worse today. I wish I could pull off a long, hard, screaming cry, but I don't have it in me. I did take my anger and frustration on a cardboard carton--stabbed it over and over. It...
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Been in a real funk the past few days. Today it just got so bad I had to just let myself cry it out. Real, loud, anguished, primal crying. Screaming and keening and beating pillows and yelling. (good...
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This is another of a series of letters I’ve written to you over the past 2 weeks. They are more for me than for you—a way of getting all of this out of my system and, maybe one day, feel ok...
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This is proving to be a really rough one. It actually started last night, when I began questioning whether I was at fault for what happened. Of course I wasn't, but what if I had never seen that text...
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A few days after we brokeup I deleted all the pics of him from my phone and laptop. Kept all the vacation pics--just moved them to the cloud so I don't keep bumping into them. Today I realized I have...
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I am trying very hard to get you out of my home and out of my mind. I've sent/donated/discarded everything I can find of yours, and am not letting myself think about it. I deleted pics of you from my...
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After 9 and i'm still in bed. I slept OK last night....a few instances of waking up and that "ohhhhhh......" moment arriving. Managed to put him out of my mind quickly by reading a little bit and...
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