I'm scared today

I'm once again doubting myself, and wondering if I did the right thing in breaking up with him. Maybe there was a way to work this out? I don't know, but today I'm feeling as though the best part of my life is over, I don't know what I'm going to do next--if I'll ever find or, for that matter FEEL love again. Will I ever be able to love someone else, or will I just be too scared. Did I do something really stupid in ending this?

For all I know he doesn't even care. That scares me most of all

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A little later now. I decided to write myself a list of chores, running from the very simple (make the bed) to the more involved (reorganize the hall closets). Figure if I can tick off a couple of even the minor things on the list I'll feel I accomplished something. 

I forgot to go to my water aerobics class tonight. Was back and forth on the phone with my daughter (who's in the hospital) and my sister and completely forgot. Try and remember the next one.

Have a dr's appt tomorrow morning. Talk to her and see if she can give me something to help me sleep. 

One of the kittens just came up on the couch with me and I gave him a snuggle. I'm really happy with the way they're coming along. Not quite two weeks ago they were living under a shed in my apt. complex and were so scared. Now they follow me all over and get lots of pets and snuggles. Wed. they go to the vet for the first time.