mahalarose

I need a new lifestyle. A new way of thinking. I need a new fucking room and a new life while I am at it. A couple of nights everything has snuck up on me all at once and I didn't knw how to get...

I've been writing in my journal obsesively. I carry it everywhere with me now. Last night was my balllll it was alright, lots of laughing and dancing. Apart from that everything else is the same...

I want to crawl up and die. I don't care that people say beat this by being active etc. I was depressed before and so I got out of my room, worked more hours went to school regularily and stopped...

Omg so I purged and I now have eye jelly coming out underneath my eye. I didn't have to use my fingers! I was glad about that. I ditched school today. My ball dress came! I look like a whale in it. ...

So aparantly me now being vegan is the most upsetting thing ever, My parents didn't like theidea but I don't care. I am going to wellington today with 2 of my friends, were gunna get stoned alllll...

Ive changed my gw to 110lbs. I just ate like 5 people worth of pasta, omg, but its out of my stomach now. Im so scared that some more is left in there. Rick and I figured out that all my life I have...

I have realised how out of control I have once again let things become. I have realised that I don't know how to get everything back to where I was happy to be. I have realised that I am still a...

I am feeling very low. My car broke down on the way home. I then decided I would have a tomato sandwich and ended up cutting the tipp of my finger off, it still bleeding. I cried and then when I was...

I am feeling amazing. I have been keeping occupied and bascically just not stopping. I do make sure I get at east 10 hours sleep each night and I am taking vitiman pills and woah what a difference. I...

I saw rick about two hours and we talked about the diffence between isolation and independence...MY GRIPS CAME TODAY!!!  I had to go pick them up cos the post man didnt want to leave them with no...

I ended up getting totally stoned, it was fun although I shouldn't have drove home. I have started a new goal to loose weight. Its my ball coming up on August 1st and I have really let myself go. I...

Im going to masterton tomorow to see Amy and Hana and hopefully get stoned again. I'm sick of Mahala's mind for a bit, and Rick encouraged me to do it..well his words were "If I had one hand of glue...

I want to cut my wrist. Any other place on my body is not the same. My wrist has healed to faint shimmers in the light. I want to do it. I need to but I don't know if I will. My wrist, I can hold it...

I will not iinjure myself  to spite her or releive myself. I can do it another way. get out of my head all of you and just leave me and calmness alone. Anger I try to fight and fight the wrong way....

I spent 7 hours in the hospital last night/this morning getting home at 3 am cos I busted my ankle at gymnastics. So I feel helpless, I hate being injured, but it is a welcome break from work (I get...