Alliegator

I don't know what's wrong with me anymore.  I feel like I'm barely holding on to sanity.  I really wish I had someone to talk to but I don't like my therapist here at school.

Well I think I have i officially relapsed into some sort of eating disorder. I definitely eat but I count calories and I haven't eaten more than 1,700. I know that sounds like a lot of food but I...

I am so sick of dreading tomorrow.  Every day I put of going to sleep because I know that as soon as I wake up I am just going to have to push myself through one more long boring day.  I don't want...

I have so much going on in real life and inside my read right now.  I don't know what to do.  Sometimes reality doesn't even feel real.  I wish I could experience real emotions. I feel sruface...

I'm not doing well at all.  I am definitely relapsing into anorexia.  Part of me is scared to have the disorder take control again and another part of me is scared not to.  

I'm struggling a lot with my weight right now.  I feel fat and I don't like my body.  I just want to work out constantly and I feel guilty every time I eat.  I know I need to stay healthy but I'm...

Still haven't cut this year!

Well I'm back from the hospital.  I feel much better about life now.  I guess it was worth it, although now I have so much homework to catch up on.  I hope all of the stress doesn't send me...

I decided to go to the hospital.  As much as I don't want to go I know that I am not safe by myself right now.  I hope this hospitalization will be helpful.

Well it has officially been one year since I was hospitalized for the first time.  To "celebrate"  last night I was extremely suicidal to the point where I has to have my roommate watch me until I...

I've been having a really shitty week.  I honestly don't even have enough energy in me to vent about it anymore.  I guess this post is kind of pointless  I really hope things get better soon 

I am having very vivid flashbacks to my hospitalizations of almost a year ago.  They were very traumatic for me and I do not like to think about them.  I am feeling very depressed and distracted...

I'm really worried that I'm gaining weight and I can't work out because of my stupid ankle.  I'm so frustrated.  I wish I could just starve myself. 

I slept through the entire night last night!!  I got 10 straight hours of sleep.  I am so happy.   I'm still stressed out about my midterms today though.  I don't know how much of the studying I...

So I guess I am awake now.  I basically only got 2 hours of sleep last night even though I had the potential to get 7.  I really hate not being able to sleep.  It used to be that I just couldn't...