loum50
Status: Spring is here.
Mood:
Good
Offline
- I can't see my current because the agency I see her at will no let me see her anymore since i do not have a therapist there. I have been looking for months now. Pdocs are hard to find.
- I haven't cut in a long time, but I just started again. I'm in depression and I'm angry and all I want to do is hurt myself. I'm also mad at myself for cutting again. I go to dialysis and the staff is very concerned. They want me to go to a psyc...
- I thought I had let go of the shame, but Friday night it all came to the surface again when I rememberred how much I was hated as a child. Most of the shame of the sexual abuse I have been able to let go of, but not the verbal abuse. When I was 5, I...
- I'm so alone and depressed today and feeling self destructive. Is anyone else alone and depressed?
- I met with my therapist this morning and was able to talk about the deep pain my child part feels about the past. I was reading a book and it triggered the feelings my child part has. He did not have parents that taught him anything about life at...
- This could be very triggering. Do not read if easily triggered.I've been on a journey exploring all my parts and have come to acceptance of them. There is a lot of different opinions about integration. That has never been my goal, although that has...
- Right now I'm working on damage done to me in childhood. My problem with criticism in any form, even when it is mental to educate me on something from the point of friends. I can't tolerate any criticism. I feel helpless at the littlest problem in...
- I got out of the hospital and acute rehab today after 24 days and 3 operations to repair the damage from my last suicide attempt. Happy Dance. Some of the damage is permanent though. I have to stop doing this.
- I have been very sick. My last suicide attempt in August of 2013 put me in for a month. I went back in 7/2 and am still in to repair some damage from the last attempt. So far this time I've had 3 operations and will be going to an acute rehab soon...
- I've been in 9 days now. I will probably be here another week and then rehab. They say I may be in rehab 2 months. I'm sick of hospitals! I worry about rehab because of some previous experiences in rehab.
- Fear - Shame - Thoughts Of Suicide - I don't want to kill myself - I've tried and have come close too many times - strong urges to hurt myself - struggling not to - here instead -take meds - tired.
- I have had manic episodes that have lasted for weeks and major depression that has lasted for years and antidepressants have had no affect on. I've had hallucinations and blackouts where I have put people in the hospital. Now that I'm on bipolar...
- Part of my baggage from the past was that I was never taught to express anger in a healthy way. I was never allowed to express anger at all, so I turned it inward and became depressed and self injuring. Some times I became suicidal.I still turn it...
- I saw my therapist today and we talked about the sexual abuse by a neighbor when I had just reached puberty. She said that was rape and we talked about the shame, guilt and the humiliation I feel. That was my first actual sexual experience. This was...
- It's been 7 months since I have SH, but the last time I ended up in the hospital for almost a month to repair the damage. I did do permant harm that will shorten my life. Today I have to start taking a medication with side effects of heart attack,...