naimalove

im a little pissed, but ok. steve's mother leaves me a message that shes coming over to help me get the house straight. who asked 4 her help? from her i feel nothing but critcism and judgement. i...

i fear that i will soon have an emotional divorce and later an actual divorce. things r not getting better...im getting angry....he keeps pushing me away...hes making no effort to get us...

i just dont feel like hes making any real effort.....corny as it sounds i swear he and i do not speak the same lang. i ask what do u want for dinner?...or my bad i suggested stewed chick...he likes...

im so tired; i was up with the baby til 4am. i ran a phone line to a jack and it was more dif than i thought it would b....i havent done it insome time; gave me a real sense of accomplishment. and...

here i am about to ring in the new yr..children sleep and the lord is here..and a half gallon of ice cream that i dont need. my husband is where he shd b; at church for watch night ball...i didnt...

well here i am up late again. i went to buy some contacts so i had to get a new prescription. ended up costing me 160 dollars...so pissed. the dr rx'ed some special lenses b/c i wear mine so much...

i was about to start looking at porn....ive been over-eating b/c of how i feel and i wanted to change my mood w/ some masterbation. i know watching porn is wrong so i shut down the computer and went...

i took a shower. i smell good and feel ok. i talked to steve a bit and it was pointless. i think i shall just try to b happy and not pressure him...hell talk when hes ready and im driving myself...

i told my husband that i resented that he did not want me to get my tubes tied. he didnt want "us" to get my tubes tied b/c he wanted to show god that we trust him. im still pissed b/c its me who...

i believe that my marriahe is the will of god, but its just so hard...i thought that id b getting a botfriend for life...he says hes with me b/c he loves me and b/c he wants to b...that is just so...

i am considering stopping nursing. i am so tired of leaking all over..i feel like a cow. my husband doesnt seem to wanna touch me...i dont like my own self right now. i feel like my whole life is...

i feel like a prisoner. and now im blind too. ive been waering one contact lens for a wgile. so this moening i accidentally tear this lone lens and now im practically blind...its definately not...

i think having a third child was a mustake. this baby wants so much more constant attn then the other two. i put him in a room and he just screams and screams for what seems like forever. he shd b...

ig money was no object id leave my husband...prob not for good cause i love him, but im wondering what im here for...i used to feel like we complimented each other and this wk its like we are...

the smiles of my children make it worthwhile. hearing their laughter makes me smile.