mahalarose

I ended up getting totally stoned, it was fun although I shouldn't have drove home. I have started a new goal to loose weight. Its my ball coming up on August 1st and I have really let myself go. I...

Im going to masterton tomorow to see Amy and Hana and hopefully get stoned again. I'm sick of Mahala's mind for a bit, and Rick encouraged me to do it..well his words were "If I had one hand of glue...

I want to cut my wrist. Any other place on my body is not the same. My wrist has healed to faint shimmers in the light. I want to do it. I need to but I don't know if I will. My wrist, I can hold it...

I will not iinjure myself  to spite her or releive myself. I can do it another way. get out of my head all of you and just leave me and calmness alone. Anger I try to fight and fight the wrong way....

I spent 7 hours in the hospital last night/this morning getting home at 3 am cos I busted my ankle at gymnastics. So I feel helpless, I hate being injured, but it is a welcome break from work (I get...

I have had hardly any time to think lately! I worked thursday and had school, I then had school on friday and worked, I worked saturday and sunday 7-2 then came home and spent 6 hours on my...

As bad as I felt I am now breathing the freshest of air in this new enviroment I would adore to call home. I went to gymnastics for the first time in three weeks! man did my spilts hurt. And I ripped...

I was swinging on the swings in the park today before my self esteem meeting..Swinging has been a way of informally rearanging myself and giving me something fresh. I was swinging for aboutu 10...

I am going to loose weight.

So Rick thinks we are getting nowhere anymore. I know hes right but no one takes in intrest in me the way he does. I go cos hes someone who listens to the craziest of craziest things I have to say....

WHAT THE FUCK! I am not going to cry. I am not going to slip into the carpet and let it devour my aspirations and dreams and leave me paralyzed for the night. I will not think about the good times,...

Stuff is still the same. I lost it a few nights ago and got my vivid and wrote all this negative stuff over my beautiful positive mural on my wall..I scribbled out the eyes on the peoples faces..I...

I just want to be sick. I've waited too long though, I've just been sitting here like an obese whale. I gave bloodd yesterday and the lady askedme how much I weigh and I told her like I didn't have a...

I have a refridgerator in my head again. I'm thankful I can still write, and read. For once, I am thankful that I am still aalive. I haven't got mcuh enthusiasm though. I have to do my geograpy, I...

My body is struggling and I am struggling to not let it influence my mind. I'm quite worried. I have been eating quite well. for the past 4 days my pee has been really dark brown. Its embarassing but...