SeekingKnowledge

*sighs* Ok I'm feeling like a jerk inside, but it pisses me off. My stbx just picked up the kids. He just bought a new car with a "special" license plate that costs extra money. It bothers me...

God, I really hate feeling this way. I just feel I can't think straight. I feel like I have no control over me. I look around, and have so many things I should/could be doing. I have desire,...

I'm really nervous about taking the new meds. (pamerol). I just feel discouraged. I don't know how people go through different meds all the time trying to find a "good" one. This is my 3rd...

I will say this to myself when I start getting the "spiraling down feeling".Think wellBe wellDon't know if it will help, but I guess it can't hurt!

Well, I've had a busy last couple days, and didn't have the opportunity to write in my journal yesterday. I wish I did, because I had a stressful yet "I am woman hear me roar" kind of day. I closed...

Ok....feeling like total psycho woman today. I lost it today, on so many levels. Work, personal life....I can't lose these 2 deals. I mean I'm suppose to close on 3 deals this month. That's...

I don't understand why this is all happening. I just can't do it anymore. THere is no hope, all I feel is dispair. I just wish he could comfort me, like I try and comfort him when he's down. He...

I look at my pic on this page, and want to feel like I did in that pic. I think that's why I posted it. I know this is awful, but I took that pic shortly after my stbx and I split up. I had such a...

When I went to bed last night I layed there for a while, like I usually do, thinking about my life and how everything in it is in limbo. I draw my curtains everynight when I go to bed. There was a...

*Sigh* I'm trying to be patient, I really am. I'm just frustated in not being able to see him now. He needs to be comfortable with seeing me. I don't question his love for me at all. He calls me...

I just got off the phone with D. He had an appt with his therapist today. I know he had a tough day. I tried to keep things light while we were on the phone. I asked if he was ok, and he said...

It's amazing the gammet of emotions one can have in a day. But, at least I haven't cried, which is a good sign. I talked with my dear friend about what's been going on in my life, and she shed some...

Today's a better day. I know it's early, but at least I woke up and didn't feel like crying. I'm hoping I can notice my surroundings more today. The Spring air, the warmer weather. I'm going to...

Oh how I wish I could see your beautiful eyes, and go back to that magical day. When none of this existed. A simpler time, when I could feel the good inside. Unlike here and now. Who would have...

I'm trying to focus on my job, but I can't even do that. I'm a failure. I never thought my life would end up like this. That I'd losing it. Never thought it would happen to me.