mal66

I have survived mostly on will; energy summoned purely to function, but none to cope, in this world filled with many obstacles & tests.  This will  fails & becomes exhausted more...

I've been in a limbo/purgatory state for quite some time now...the inertia of doing nothing & my mastery of procrastination has seemingly been my primary suicide intervention...Walking that fine line...

My life is like a chess board; the objective: to get to the other side and meet the King with an army of pawns and no Queen...

I wonder if there's anything beneath 'Rock Bottom'...?  Might as well check since I'm here...

If I could have an OBE (Out of Body Experience), I wonder if I would hug myself out of pity OR punch myself square in the face until I have a NDE (Near Death Experience)...

Life Purpose?I think we are all given a blank canvass with the only instructions to draw, paint, construct whatever we desire...there is no right or wrong 'answer'...Some have detailed drawings,...

I must be a vampire, 'cause when I look in the mirror I see nothing... 

Wish I could hit the 'FAST-FWD' button on my life and walk away... 

"So glad the Lord woke me up to see another day...""I am so blessed that I see another day above ground..." I am so at odds and in complete opposition to these & other synonymous affirmations;...

Battling severe depression is like climbing a steep, icy slope on a mountain that seemingly has no pinnacle...a miscalculated step up the incline sends me spiraling back to my point of origin -...

Another day in paradise (*sarcasm intended*)...each day induces another bitter, mental nauseousness...I have been attending local bi-polar/depression support groups in an attempt to remind myself...

Getting up from where I lay,Same question, different day...Should I go or should I stay?Grinding out another wayTo keep my demons far away...

I am still here treading thru life because I seemingly have to..Although my suicidal thoughts haven't been as dominant, I still struggle with ideations of being my own assassin or atleast the...

I grudgingly made the transition to my 'new beginning' by moving into my new 2br apartment..I am by myself; closer to my job..My first few nights were spent unpacking, going to the stores and buying...

I am plowing thru this transition with much disdain & lethargy - albeit probably not with the most open of minds or positive outlooks but I continue to put one foot in front of the other (perhaps...