mal66

I'm trying to break my drinking habit and give my new meds a chance to work. Only had a beer (Michalob Ultra) last nite - only 1. Proud of myself. I was tempted, but resisted. The thought of...

I pray to GOD everyday for him to do my 'dirty work'; he gave me a taste of what he's capable of and almost answered my prayers.  I was coming home (well not really, on my way to the liguor store)...

I awoke this morning with tremendous anxiety of the future; my marriage has been giving a 1yr timeline before me and my wife make the transition to separation and then divorce.  I feel very angry,...

So far things are going ok;  this is a rare occurance for me that I'm uneasy.  Paranoia/pessimism still rules!  Am I being set up?  I'll tread with caution and try not to look for things to go...

Today's my birthday!  As of last week I wasn't sure if I'd be here to write this...Met with the Psycholigist and I will start a brand new med today; will see where this leads.  My efforts are still...

These aren't my exact words but are my EXACT feelings and I copied them from a website : pscychologyinfo.com/depression/major-description..."It takes the greatest effort to get out of bed in the...

Tomorrow's my birthday (July 6th). My 'present' to myself is a visit with the psychologist to try other meds that may combat my depression.   I've always felt apprehensive about meds to alter the...

I am already my own worse enemy...If I could only learn to be my 'better half'...

Depression is a disease of the devil's conception... It creates an illusion self-destruction is the only path to salvation.. It lowers your expectations to suicidal aspirations.. Representing...

I have an appointment today with my therapist that I will cancel. He can't tell me anymore than he already has; nor will I have anything new to tell him. Same shit, different week - hi's/lows. The...

Is suicide really selfish??? Why...it's my life!!!  Not everyone can be happy - not even most of the time.  Why should I be terminally miserable and therefore cause misery to everyone around me? ...

Another day...as long as I'm functional than it can be considered a neutral (not clinically depressed, but not happy) day.  I'm satisfied with this position; happiness is so far beyond my...

I went to my first group session last nite. Everyone introduced themselves and told me a little about them including the group leaders/facilitators, who themselves, went thru (still going thru) some...

Going to my fist DBSA (Depression and Bi-Polar Support Alliance) support group tonite (WAHOOOO!)...

Each day that goes by I lose grip on any connection to this world, including my own flesh and blood.  If I could only will myself away...