Alex-Scott

Well... as many on here do, I suffered another relapse. Hard to admit... so very hard to admit. I still want to "prove" I am not an addict by doing a little gambling now and again, or maybe thats one...

Trying my best to stay on the path to recovery... Going through the whole, "its not that bad, its not an addiction, I can do a little for fun" phase, which is a struggle. There are certain things I...

Trying to get over the hump... getting late and Im very tired but its been far too long since I wrote an entry. Things are kinda crazy right now, I feel on one hand like I am in a good rhythm but on...

Wednesday, first week back at work, and hitting a bit of a "hump". Found it hard to wake up again today, but I only have myself to blame, staying up late and hitting snooze on my clock, which just...

As a follow up to my Dec 12 posting, I did get in the Christmas spirit, I did enjoy a wonderful break from work and time off and saw my sister from out West, I didn't get any gifts really this year...

Well we are already a few days into the new year but so far so good! I am now 64 days without gambling, and feeling pretty positive about everything. I have made some big changes in my relationship...

I have been gamble free for 42 days now, or rather this is my 42nd day. I am having a really rough day today, and have been having a bit of a rough time lately in general. Things were starting to...

Ok, Day 5 is almost over! Things are starting to improve a little bit, I have accepted my financial situation and I am going to do everything I can to improve it - the honest way. I got myself a...

1 day... 1 day... 1 day at a time... today is day 2. Why have I done this to myself? Why do I allow myself to actively try and destroy every relationship I have? What is wrong with me?I dont know...

eating too much junk food, wasting time at work. angry and impatient and frustrated.

I know I can do this, I can do better though... When I created this goal I called it "zero tolerance" but then I have slipped in a few "just this" or a little "its ok" here and there. I can be proud...

I just wanted to update this thing to show that I gambled again this wknd... I cant seem to make it through a whole week even anymore, I guess I am not trying and giving into the depression, I dont...

boughjt a 5er ticket for the game tonight :(

Another trigger for me seems to be dreaming, literally dreaming while I am sleeping, about winning or even finding money. I have to recognize that these are probably the result of my thoughts and...

Well Friday I slipped and fell again. Not a big fall or a hard fall but I broke my streak. Not happy about it, but I feel good that I did restrain myself from going all out. Friday is the toughest,...