heretic
Status: wish it was over
Mood:
Ok
Offline
- I've lived in this state for 3 years and I only had a couple of friends. In July one of my friends moved out of state, and in August the other one moved out of state. I went from talking to them every day on the phone and seeing them once a week or...
- I need a drug that makes me happy all the time. Simple. So many drugs on the market - how come none induce euphoria? Is extreme happiness supposed to be a bad thing? The drugs I take keep my mood stabilized and my depression at bay. But I sure don't...
- I've never been anyone's first priority. When I was born I was not my parents first priority and I've been looking for someone to put me first ever since. It's hard seeing other people making their loved ones their first priority when I have never...
- I know a certain amount of social unease can come with Bipolar but how bad does it need to be before it becomes a disorder in itself?I am very antisocial, I have only two friends I talk to occasionally and I talk to no one at work. I go no where...
- I wish I felt better, I feel borderline manic and sad at the same time, Trying to control my racing thoughts, can't sleep even with the drugs. I really feel sick and I keep telling myself I will feel better soon. I sure hope this passes quickly.
- I totally trashed my life, over and over again, and didn't even realize what I was doing till years later - after getting on meds. The is no way to undo decades of damage. I've probably hurt dozens, maybe hundreds of people. Just the realization of...
- I'm like a black hole of sadness
- I can feel it. The the antsy feeling, hard to control thoughts, angry, lashing out at strangers. I was dx BP1 a year ago, tried a few different meds, found ones that work about 5 months ago. I've been fairly stable but small things can really tilt...
- The old thoughts and feelings are creeping back, the anger and bitterness, the thoughts of ending it all. My meds seem to work fine, it's just my life - or lack of one - that is painful. And there is no relief in sight.
- I have very few friends. Maybe 3. And one of them is moving out of the state in a week. I am so sad I won't be able to see him again for a long time, till he decides to come back to visit. No mire calling hom up and being able to go to each others...
- I'm so angry so often and it's horrible. I'm jealous of what others have and am very self-pitying. This is gonna hurt one of my only friendships if I don't get an attitude adjustment. But I don't know how to stop feeling this way. My life is pretty...
- It's making me feel a little better to think about the ways in which I could be worse off - weird twist on positive thinking but whatever works I guess. So just for today I'll be glad for what I have and glad for the things I don 't have to put up...
- I have so many mixed emotions going on right now. I find myself being really angry over all kinds of things, some of which happened years ago. Then I'll feel depressed at having a generally crappy life. Then I'll have extreme anxiety over stuff...
- When I am manic I don't eat, I can get very thin and people tell me I look great - but I know its unhealthy - still I like being thin.Then when I am depressed I eat alot and gain weight. In fact gaining weight is one of the ways I notice I am...
- I've had a few encounters with the unenlightened lately and leads me to thinking that I should keep the fact I have Bipolar hidden better. It would be nice to be able to openly share and find understanding but in average social settings that just...