heretic
Status: wish it was over
Mood:
Ok
Offline
- I know I deserve to be lovedI deserve to be taken care ofI don't deserve to have a mental illnessWhy did the universe give me what I don't deserve, while denying me what I do deserve. I feel like I live in the f'ing twilight zone.
- I take Welbutrin when I crawl outta bedVistaril When I get to workMore Vistaril half way through the dayGeodon with dinnerSeroquel at bedtimeThen I do it over againAnd I'm still walking the tightrope of functionality. Nobody knows the effort it...
- I was taking 100mg of Wellbutrin, and the jittery, anxious, shaky feeling was unpleasant but I was dealing with it, told my pdoc and she lowered the dose to 75mg. What a difference, no more anxiety, and all it took was a small tweak.
- I have a dear friend who is wonderful in many ways. I do treasure her friendship. She has a boyfriend that she has lived with for many years, and I can't stand the jerk. She makes excuses for his horrible behavior and will even lie to make him look...
- My doc changed the dosage of one med, and added another drug to the daily cocktail for a total of 4. I'm thinking this combo should work well - here's to hoping.....Thank you to the special people who helped me get through last night - you know who...
- Anyone else use moodtracker.com or moodscope.com? I've been using both for a month and I don't like what I see. I'm outta control and nobody can see it but me. F'ing scary.
- I called the community mental health clinic where I receive care several days ago. They do not take phone calls, period. Voice mail only. So I leave my number a couple of times, details, name and birthdate and why I'm calling. And I wait. And wait....
- I feel like the world is toxic to me, I've never had healthy people in my life, healthy people don't like to hang out with sick people.So I've been surrounded by sick people since childhood. And I hate the things I've seen happen. I hate the way...
- All I get offered is sex, when what I crave is intimacy.I want someone to know me, but the guys I date seem to think that intimacy means sex. I can't find even one who understands that intimacy involves getting to know someone on a much deeper...
- I take great comfort in isolation.This doesn't mean I don't long for a life partner to support and care for me. I most certainly need that badly and have been suffering greatly without it.But given the way most people are, I find it comforting not...
- I wish there was more activity here.
- Thunder and Lightening. It's so beautiful I had to go for a walk in it, wore the thinnest shirt I have so I could feel those beautiful rain drops. It's been a long hard summer.
- Does anyone else use sex to help ease the loneliness? I know it's a dangerous practice and causes more problems than it solves. And it usually benefits my partner more than it benefits me. Guess I should learn better.
- The weather has a huge impact on my life because I have to walk several miles to work and back each day, so I'm out in the weather a lot.For the past five months I have had to do many things to accommodate the harsh weather. With temperatures...
- The hardest part for me is the social stigma.I can eat right, exercise, get plenty of sleep, keep all of my doc appts, never forget to take medication. I maintain a stress-free homelife.But there is just no way to "manage" people who think having...