Ellocin

mom's coming in and we're gonna go to the thrift shop.  I hope my anxiety doesn't get bad.  I want to get out but I keep getting panicky.  When I get back I want to try and make something.  Maybe...

This dumb anxiety makes me feel like cutting.  Trying not to give in.  Just feeling so edgy right now.  I dunno how much I can take.  I got appointment set with counselor for next Wednesday. ...

I'm still okay....not great, not lousy.  Still having some anxiety but I think it's getting better...haven't taken an Ativan since Sunday.  My psychiatrist said that the anxiety and some of the...

I'm at my parents.  Doing okay though still having moments of bad anxiety.  And some other weird moments were I'm not anxious but it feels like the ground is moving when I'm standing still.  It's...

I had a whole entry written up and it dissappeared on me.  :(  Anyway, I'm doing better today...still a little anxious but not nearly so bad as yesterday.   Thinking of going to my parents for...

I'm feeling really anxious again.  I only have one Ativan to get me through until I see my psychiatrist on Monday.  I'm not used to feeling so much anxiety.   I did go out for a walk today, went...

Made it out of bed and had breakfast.  Still feeling lots of anxiety so gave in and took an Ativan.  I'm thinking I might go for a walk for a bit and see if that helps.  I don't usually feel so...

I'm having a bit of a hard time still.  Not so bad as before I went into hospital but still a little off.  I'm feeling really anxious right now, but I don't want to take the Ativan yet.  I only...

I'm home again.  Was discharged this afternoon.  So good to be home again.  Feeling a lot better then I did a few days ago.  Still in a bit of pain from the way the muscles were spasming...which...

I had a reaction to all the loxapine in my system.  My jaw started spasming, then my tongue started doing it's own weird thing (i swear it was trying to rip out of my throat)...then it moved through...

there needs to be a face for molre than horrible....i just scrwed up my job shadow opportunity...and she tells me not to worry about it.,..but this was such a good opportunity...i'm so fucken pissed...

i'm too scared to go...and i ended up taking more loxapine... i don'tknow what to do...i'm just too much a chicken... what am i suppose to do...and how the hell am i suppose to do it...i wish i had...

I'm thinking of maybe going to the ER...I don't want to but I think that I might have to.  I'm scared though...I don't want to go alone but I have no one to go with me.  I'm suppose to be staying...

the crisis lines around here are freakin usless.  I'm miserable but they just told me to go watch tv.  Fuck like thats gonna do anything.  I just got back from the post office and mailed the swap...

i oded last night...on my loxapine...didn't do much except make me sleep for a good 17+ hours...feeling miserable...and to top it off my period started... gonna get up and go to the postoffice...