I'm thinking of maybe going to the ER...I don't want to but I think that I might have to.  I'm scared though...I don't want to go alone but I have no one to go with me.  I'm suppose to be staying strong for my family.  My aunt is going through chemo...my BIL is scheduled for heart surgery this week...and I'm suppose to job shadow sometime this week...not sure when yet.  Yet I can't keep myself safe.  I don't want the hospital to be an option...but I don't know anything else.  I'm so fucken scared right now.  I don't know whjat I should be doing...I just don't know.