2songbirds

I"ve been trying for the last 1 1/2 years to keep myself busy. Now that I"ve gone back to school fulltime (grad school), and working, and taking care of kids and household, things have subsided. I've...

((sigh)) I haven't been feeling well for 2 weeks now. Damn bad cold. My AF is due this coming up sunday/monday and the pms already kicked in..now...today after he got home from work he kept goosing...

well, we had our nightly sessions now 2 weeks in a row. This past week I took off the parental controls on the tv. I told him to go on the computer.His therapist told my therapist at their lil' phone...

he won't allow me time alone, to myself, my space. I had to yell at him the the other night...after him trying to F "ing lie to me....about him forgetting about 2 of our weekly sessions  together.HE...

I am seriously torn. I don't know if I should throw in the towel or not. I know he loves me, NOW,...I know he's trying NOW...but, the damage is done. The damage has been done. without him threatening...

Just as the heading...this deep dark place he triggered me in..It wouldn't have been as bad if he would've just kept his mouth shut that he forgot...I've gotten used of this behaviour over the...

Exactly as the heading. I feel like anymore he's trying to "catch up" on snuggling intimate time. I actually feel like he's smothering me. I can't stand it sometimes. I want distance, I NEED my...

I'm here, just reading various stuff on DS, playing my FB games that I use to relax me and such...and I glance down at the clock on the computer. Notice the date. at this time it was 12:30am. It was...

I'm going to address this more with my therapist on monday, but i'm noticing the panic attacks aren't subsiding as I thought they were. I'm having black out episodes, best I can describe them. I...

So, I know that H discussed what happened during the last two weeks with his therapist and his SA group. It affects him too. However, there's no discussion about it between us. He said that through...

How does his actions/moods affect us as a family? How do they make us feel?That is what my therapist wants me to focus on right now. I think in some ways this is more detrimental to me...to us....for...

I'm trying my damnest not to think this, not to analyze, not to act this out...but I've been thinking anymore of it just being best to divorce. I know it's said to not do anything drastic in the...

I'm doing my best not to go down that self pity road lately. A few major things happened in our relationship, and milestones are to come1st) I realized that yesterday we did what I never wanted my...

It's amazing how the little slightlest things can trigger such emotion. I've been doing better lately, than from when I iniatially discovered the extent of my betrayalI realized tonight, after many...

well, as I was writing my entry earlier today, before I went into work, H came home, and I had to get ready to leave.I honestly didn't think about this anniversary date all evening until I was online...