well, as I was writing my entry earlier today, before I went into work, H came home, and I had to get ready to leave.
I honestly didn't think about this anniversary date all evening until I was online just a little bit ago, researching something else when I glanced down on the computer screen at the time, then I saw the date. then BLAM. It hit me. I got thrown back to 5 months ago, when I brought a new addition home after work (new fish I got especially for him). I took care of the fish, changed into jammies, went online to pay bills, but was having trouble online so I ran the antivirus spyware, and went into the computer to chase down the virus. Just at about this time right now.
this is when my life was thrown into turmoil, realizing how he had lied to me over the years, making me doubt myself, my intuition. In about another hour is when after I gathered the "hard" proof, I threw my cell phone at him, while he slept, and calling him a f'ing asshole...crying, and walked away. I remember how he stood up, still half asleep not realizing what was going on.
I hate these anniversary dates. Last month wasn't so bad, as he stayed up with me, and we actually had a good time, and I forgot about it for the night.
But, i'm the only one left in the household up right now....