AnxietyFreak40
Status: People in toxic relationships don’t love each other. They love the idea of each other. ~Mark Manson
Mood:
Ok
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Why is it when I am trying to get up the nerve to talk to HIM about our problems that I am suddenly blank and don't know what to say? This weekend we do not have the kids and no real plans..I'm...
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It is the end of another up and down day...once again DS is not whole. The anxiety that stayed thru the night has given way to the usual sadness that follows. By beautiful Remi had to go to the...
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DS is still not working...now regular meebo on the fritz also? the dog is sick...I am having an anxiety attack. He has a meeting in Sacramento today so he cannot stay home with the dog...I guess...
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You just become dependent on it...and then when it's not there..you fall apart.
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I realized I am still mad about how mean he has been this weekend. I went to get up and go to the gym...He's the one pushing for me to go in the morining before work...I wanted to go after...
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I did not write yesterday...had an awful anxiety attack as soon as I woke up...so bad I wondered at first if I was actually sick...tried to eat breakfast but couldnt eat ..didn't think it was going...
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OK...so I got a good grade on my history exam...started at the gym...really sore today but that's ok...work not so stressful today...life should be good right? REally????? I have a slightly sore...
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We got a gym membership this weekend and last night I started with a trainer. I am hoping that by building my strength I can reduce my pain and increase my overall health. However..we will see if...
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This morning after a miserable friday night I am calmly reflecting on whether I can leave or not. I understand the disease far better than when I first began these journals. I no longer take it...
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Always with the bad dreams...of which I can't remember a single thing other than they leave me feeling anxious and sick. I am so tired...he is back to sleeping in the living room again. He does...
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so much drama lately I don't know where to even begin. After the whole thing on Weds with my mom's roommate it turns out there is way more going on than I had thought. Apparently he contacted the...
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Anyone who lives with an alcoholic is completely insane. The hope that tonight will be different...that tonight he won't drink so much...that tonight being with me will be more important than the...
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Finally both funerals are behind me. I am not looking forward to returning to work however. of course the first night we are back he slept in the recliner again. Guess being next to me in the...
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I am not sure whether it's a relief to be finally to Sunday or a dread that following sunday is Monday...ugh...I reallllyy don't want to go back to work. I think He can tell he is on thin ice with...
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No not the soap opera...that's where I am. Here for the funeral of my boyfriends' grandmother. I feel like I got hit by a truck again. I think all these hops to different regions is killing my...
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