alantm
Status: just lost ...looked a lot..and no paths ..im lost
Mood:
Bad
Offline
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odd fealing of being droppedafew feelings a bit like when i came back tothis house when i lost everythingmixed messagesthat are making me feel one thing then anotherits reacting at a leavel thats not...
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so i ran away from worki will look at emails tomorrowi did reply to the one chasing mebut he is in the wrong he should feel all the up sets not meso f them
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the younger girl says nice things about meand has emailed me a lot over 2 daysshe said i look nicebut i always say she is wrongshe sent me her phone numbershe is 26my ex turkish girl was about...
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so i leftand drove to the next town 30 milesspent a while thereand drove to a shopping center 15 miles from thereits a place i used to go tolots of past thoughts therewith ex'salso young couples...
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today was a bad dayi spent the night dreaming stressful problemsi was even making up problemswhen i woke i felt uneasylooked at work emails that were miledbut i saw as quite threatening to meand i...
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test page i in a way feel i have to say sorry for listing this because i feel its a bit odd for someone to see but here it its anyway iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
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took 3 days off emailworki still made a few things but.i have closed own on contact for a few days i feel i have the right tobut have some small guilit about it i really need to stop moving...
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basic post again worn out after gigtonight altered my pedal set upand played 95% of the first set with one legand 100% of the second set with one leg...this is a total shock that for now has opened a...
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quick postworn outalmost quit work in musicthings getting me down and i feel to unstable to be with people- a freinds daughter seems to like me but she is very young26?-- lastgot a van door slammed...
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spelling is taking a nose dive againeven readingtoday in a shop i read a card ...like a birthday cardbut for a new jobi read it on thought what an odd cardwhen i looked agin i worked it outfirst time...
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detachment bit depressed at having to go to sleapthe things im dreaming are not niceand i dont wantto go into that world againi do wake upset or even scraed sometimessleap is not a nice place for...
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ok last postim back to needing to sleap to get me away from being awakethats not good :(
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feeling alonenite :(
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i wasa cutter but i have very few signs of it.i dont have scares that anyone would noticei wasnt a deep cutter.im thinking off this because church girl exwas quite a messlots of linesi though of how...
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if i just have to live this life and diewhy am i stuck with this dark personawhy am i not happy and up beatwhy am i living tinted like thisits hurting mebasicaly why
dd