gkg21
Status: I have overcome many obstacles in my life. Grief, I cannot overcome. It lurks in the shadows, waiting, waiting. It comes, as someone said,
Mood:
Ok
Offline
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Saturday, 6-20-09: I have been really puny! Last week-end Craig brought this nasty cold/virus/something, home. I have been pretty puny for the last several days. I started coming down with...
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6-12/13-09: I am feeling a bit better. I still am anxious, but not as much. I am back on my anti-depressant, but only for two days. I don't know if that would make a difference, or not. I...
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6-9-09: I don't know why I am feeling so anxious! It all began (again) when my friend killed himself. I thought I would start to feel better after all the services were over. I don't. Of...
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Sun. night, June 7: It has been a really hard week! Last Sunday, a co-worker/friend, killed himself. He hung himself. I struggle with the image. He was only thirty-five. I visited with...
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Wednesday, May 27, 2009: Today was not horrible. This past weekend was tough. Melissa's angel date was the 24th. And, going to the cemetery's for Memorial Day, is always hard. Anyway,...
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May 10, 2009: This morning I woke up in a HUGE funk! No gifts, no greetings, ect. Scott was always so good about making sure he said Happy/Merry, whatever! I miss him so much! But, as the...
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Tuesday, May 5: I am a bit better. For the first time in my life I truly understand why "cutters" cut. Yesterday, I tripped over one of my student's foot. (It was not his fault...just an...
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5-2-09: I am having so many flashbacks! I just keep seeing Scott laying there with his eyes "staring" at the ceiling. I keep wondering if he knew he was dying and couldn't call for help or if...
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4-16-09: Today was tough on so many levels. Tomorrow it will be twenty-two months since Scott passed away. Today it has been twenty-two months since I last saw him alive. I will never forget...
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4-14-09: I wrote a journal entry the other day that I somehow deleted. Good thing. It was very dark. I had just had "one of those days." I am doing a bit better today, I think, I guess. ...
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4-3-09: This is a rough day for me. It was 29 years ago, today, this was one of the hardest days of my life. Now, it is still hard, but nothing compares to the pain of losing Scott. I have...
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Thursday, 3-26-09: Funky mood....For the past few days I have really been struggling with depression and missing Scott. I have been off work this week, for Spring Break, and thought it would be...
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3-13-09: It has been a while since I have written a journal,although I have been reading other's. I have been busy, sick, busy! A lot has/is happening these days. I stepped totally out of "my...
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So, another week is gone and another on the way.... I just feel like I go through the motions. I breathe, but don't live. I used to look forward to things. A lot. Now, I try to look forward...
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Sat., 2-14-09: Uneventful Valentine's Day, here. Of course, it never is too exciting. I have been in a bit of a funk all week, though. I always have given the "boys" a small box of...
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