mstillstanding

I woke up early as usual this morning with racing thoughts about all the issues in my life. I'm going to attempt to corral these thoughts/issues here so maybe I can stop obsessing about them all...

I am doing better in many ways, but this is so up & down. I'm having such difficulty being comfortable with myself. I do miss him, but it is not gut-wrenching like the last times. I am very sad, but...

I got all my stuff out & in storage within 2 hours. Everything I own is now in a 10 x 10 shed. I had some friends help. He was nice and helpful. He had everything in the garage and loaded up the...

I will be getting everything out of his house today. I've hardly slept all night. I'm okay though & I am so glad to be doing this.

Tomorrow is moving day. I've rented a storage & a U-Haul truck.  My son-in-law and a couple of friends are going over with me to get my stuff & take it to storage.I was able to pack most of it on...

I am doing better emotionally. The lows are not so low and they don't last as long. I am missing him, but I've been missing him for a long time before I left him.I was "allowed" to go pack my stuff...

One week ago today I left my alcoholic, abusive SO.  I will from now on refer to him as the X, not the SO.I have gone through so much emotionally, but have received so much support. I am very...

Having a hard time finding a comfortable place today. I leftthe mmotel & came to my daughter's. IIt's a holiday so both she & her husband are home today. The house is small & I just couldn't find a...

I woke up this morning with a little bit of clarity. He is still controlling my thoughts, actions, mood.  I am allowing this to happen.Spoke with him last night. In a  25 minute conversation he...

I have been blessed, truly on this journey so far. I am so lucky to have family and friends to help me, to have a crisis center that was able to see me the same day, and to have a faith in God that...

I'm giving myself a present today.  One more day away from him.  Every day away I'm a little stronger.I'm all over the place. I'm overeating, not sleeping, exhausted, talking my head off, sad,...

Long day, a good & bad day. An empowering, sad, encouraging and dangerous day.I told him I'm done. He took it well at first. He said he was done also. He apologized for screaming in my face and then...

My mom called me this morning. I wasn't going to say anything to her for a few days. I wanted to be sure. She said "Are you okay". I lost it. I told her everything. My 78 year old amazing mother is...

I've made it for 19 hours away from him. I have so much to figure out. I know one thing for sure this morning. At this moment, I don't want to go back. I really don't want to go back.  I am so...

I'm such a mess. Such a mess. I left only 4 1/2 hours ago & I'm so sad, so scared, so f**ing freaked out.I'm in a crappy motel 6 room. I wish I would have spent more for a better motel. It's scary...