asda, I know the feeling. I am realizing how uncertain life is and while I may drop a plate I'm going to give myself some grace, realize I'm human and pick the plate up and spin it again. Usually it is fear that causes me to drop that plate, or lie; I'm finally at that place where I am beginning to cope with my fears and realize they are not going to kill me; I can survive them. The fear of embarrassment, the fear of failure, the fear of imperfection; the fear someone might not like me - I have no control over any of those things, but I do have control over me; I have control over whether I lie or don't lie; I have control over how I chose to face my fears. I only have control over me and the irony is the more I exercise self control and release the need to control external factors, the happier and more content I become.

I hope everyone enjoys a lie-free Wednesday!

mornin' y'all
if you live in the east, i hope that ll is well with you and yours, the winter is kicking butt back home it seems the entire state is under a state of emergency..."hump day" and so far so good....with the weather and a few other 'goings on' there have been occasions that would have allowed me to 'embellish the truth, stop, think, slow the mouth and speak, so far , so good. but like the old joke, i've just awakened and i have the rest of the day to get thorough. to all the new folks i'd like to say welcome and i'm sorry i don't list you by name, i should just to make sure i remember (bad with names) 'tom' welcom back, 'bk' welcome as well hope you both find the group to be as big a help as all the rest of us have. good truthful day to all of us

Good morning Everyone! Welcome bkay, and welcome back tom. Things have been going not so well today. I haven’t lied, but I’ve created a bad situation that I’m having great difficulty resolving. There are a number of comments that have been posted that are pertinent – especially now. Checking in often does a number of things – not the least of which to remind me that I want to live differently than I have in the past. And to live differently (by that I mean better), I have to pay attention, slow down, think, and say the right thing. I’m finding that it is not enough to say the truth, but rather it is really important that I say the truth and say it the right way. This is problem for me because often the situation is fluid and there is no formula. So, sometimes I open “open mouth, insert foot.” Not only make a situation bad, but actually tends to make a bad situation worse – and so, promotes my fear and panic. One outcome of this is that I don’t believe in my own abilities to deal with this bad situation. I need to apply the wisdom from the group – slow down, think, THEN speak. Thanks to this group for being here when I need to talk to people who understand. I hope things are going well for everyone – and that you have wonderful, honest Wednesday.

Hi, I am digging out of the snow on the East Coast and staying honest via e-mail and in-person with my live-in girlfriend.

goodnight all. i've been mia for a bit. but ive been honest.
hope you all had a honest day. and wish you well with all the struggles to stay honest

Hi peeps

Have a great night and be honest I know I am trying. You all are good people other wise you wouldn't even be looking for help and support. Keep you chins up and fight the good fight!!

Happy Thursday to everyone. Today will be a stressful day, make that potentially stressful. I need to remind myself to not become emotional, to stay focused, take deep breaths, slow down and think before responding. I have been lie free for several days now, but today will test me, of that I'm sure.

I'm grateful to everyone on this site - you guys are a constant reminder of how to be lie-free - thank you.

On another blog on LA, there is mention (this goes back a few years) about starting a LA phone meeting. Does anyone know if this is taking place? If so, how to get involved?

morning y'all
hope that things are going well for y'all, well, hell for everyone..'t' i hope that you and yours are doing okay in the digging out process.'bng' man do i ever understand about 'open mouth' been there doing that and it is hard especially as you say when the moment is so fluid, ( i like the description).i'm gonna be in those exact circumstances this afternoon and dread it, but know that if i take my time and think, i can do it. 'mj' glad to see you back and to all those who have been coming here, reading and posting, thank you for your help and inspiration, we all need that...have a good and truthful day

Hi...I am N.A. and I am a liar...I have not lied today.

Good afternoon All - and welcome t and LG! I think about all you guys often. Today medicx and btr, you’re going through what sounds like a particularly tough day. But think about what you’ve already been through and the strength it took for you to get where you are now. My thoughts and good wishes are with you. Turns out that I’ve back-slid. I’ve been mostly honest for the last couple days. But those old behaviors are really well ingrained. If I don’t pay strict attention – or if I get to feeling as if I’m “all better” – I go back to my old habits. And even though I’ve been honest the majority of the time, mostly is not good enough. I need to focus, slow down, think (about what my lies do to others and myself, and about what is true), then speak the truth. And say it in a way that those close to me understand – and I don’t hurt them in the process. I wish you all a wonderful, honest Thursday. Stay strong!

yesterday turned out better than expected. I stayed centered and avoided lies; this morning though has been a different story. I was not truthful with my wife about my feelings and I need to come clean with her. That is definitely not the way I want to start my day.

Lying has gotten me into a very precarious situation. Although I have been mostly truthful for a month (most of my lies deal with how I'm really feeling) the momentum of my lies has carried me to new lows and it appears the momentum may well continue. That doesn't mean I give up, it means I dig deeper.

I hope everyone has a great lie-free Friday - welcome to the group ST and LG, it really does help, but you have to keep coming back, it only helps if you participate.

Hi this is my first checkin... I'm a liar, but have not lied today.

My lying has caused tremendous pain to my wife. I'm hopeful that she'll trust me again at some point. I hope that today is the first step in making that a reality. I have a meeting scheduled with a local counseler, but need daily support... which is why I came here.

It's amazing the weight that's been lifted off my shoulds just simply admitting about being a liar. I know this won't be easy and much damage has been done that I'm hopeful can be repaired.

Thanks in advance for the support.

howdy y'all

well today i met with a person i met about a year ago and explained to her that i had lied by omission and to cover other lies. i'm not sure how she really took it, she is a lady and said ti was okay and that we would still be friends. this meeting took place with the knowledge of the lady that i'm trying to get back together with. when i told of the meeting she seemed okay with it. no i'm not so sure i wish i could know what's in a persons mind so i would know if i'm doing the right thing. i don't, so all i can do is the best i can.
i'l like to welcome 'jg', 'lg', t123.' and 'ht' if i missed anyone i apologize. folks this is a great bunch of folks who know how difficult it can be to remain honest when we have, some of us, been lying for years. keep up the good work, and by the powers that be we'll make it work for all of us...
good week end folks..

Happy lie-free Saturday everyone. I clarified with my wife my lie, omission from yesterday. It wasn't a big deal except for me any lie no matter the magnitude is a big deal to me.

The rest of yesterday was anxiety-ridden, but made it through without committing additional lies. whew. Welcome JG - I hope you keep posting and reading from this blog - it helps, but only if you stay involved and committed to recovery for you.

hello all.
i feel empty. like a disconnect from everything. everything is changing and i dont want it to. i hate changes, but i cant stop it.
sigh.