laurim45

Today is my son's birthday and the end of a very painful month. I miss him so much and I have MADE people in my family listen to me speak his name this past week. We are going to clear a small area...

What I had always desired was to see my son Patrick walking into church and remembering his salvation. I would always imagine him singing. He was a persistent guy and I knew he would be a wonderful...

 I awoke this morning as usual, yet as the morning progresses, I feel a newness springing up. I having been praying since day one of this fiery journey for God to be glorified in this crippling...

I did not sleep but a few hours last night. You see, since the eighth of May there has been a missing teenage boy in our area and it been so hard to watch unfold. Most of the community spent weeks...

I made it through Mother's Day relatively unscathed. From all the updates I read, I had braced myself. I spent the week leading up to the event venting at my son, Patrick. Is at on my screen porch...

 Yesterday was the first day that I did not cry..not the whole day. We were up at 5am to get the Sonrise service ready. It is an annual service at our house and afterward we put on a breakfast and...

After an event filled weekend, I had a wake up and pray for everybody kind of night. I did ax I was beckoned and prayed until I fell asleep again. What a wonderful dream/ vision I had. In the dream,...

I had a nice time at women's convention today. I got in the car to go home and I got a text from my daughter in law. She had just fallen asleep at the wheel and hit a pole. Everyone is ok we think,...

I could really use some prayers this morning. I am being interviewed for a documentary on PTSD. They want me to talk about my son Patricks early years, before he came back from the Navy. I just want...

After a stress filled weekend fueled by panic attacks since my DOL announced that she was moving thousands of miles away and taking my grandson with her, I woke Monday in despair remembering that I...

I got a text from my daughter in law this morning.. She has decided to let her house go under bankruptcy and move to someplace other than Maine...it has been all of three months since my son died and...

My stepson Justin called two nights ago from jail, and since his Dad was not home, I spoke to him. Near the end of the 15 minute conversation, he asked how Patrick and his family were doing. I felt...

I spent the night at my son's house for the first time since he took his life there. I have not been there for more than a pick up /drop off before this. My daughter in law took a trip to Florida,...

Yesterday I awoke to be sure my daughter was dressed warmly enough for the sub degree weather on her way to school. She was not, so I made her come in for gloves coat and a hat. She through several...

This my first attempt at trying to journal. Most importantly I need to express my gratitude to all of you who sent hugs, messageD or just friended me. I have not had a lot of time to grieve or even...