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Age: 44

Gender: Male

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random musings

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 02/20/2022

0

So I overheard in a meeting today that if I would have committed suicide if I actually wanted to die or something like that. Take out the commit part and it kind of makes sense to me. I have a problem with people using the word commit to refer to suicide because it refers to when suicide was a crime but other than that I relate to it. I think that if I had actually wanted to die by suicide I would have killed myself. I know this is really serious talk but I'm not suicidal at all I'm...
Journal Comment

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 02/07/2022

nopopculture commented on nopopculture's journal Loss and New Hope
Loss and New Hope

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 02/07/2022

3

I lost my cat a couple weeks ago to cancer. She had undergone chemo but it was unsucessful. I had to have the vet come to my house to help her pass peacefully. It was one of the hardest things I have done. I have lost both my parents, but neither one of them was under my control. This was directly under my control, and I still have grief over it. One of my dear friends sent me a memorial necklace in her memory that has her fur in it. I clipped some before the vet got here so I would have it for...
Journal Comment

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 02/07/2022

nopopculture commented on bobinmaine's journal Lesson learned
New Friend

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 12/29/2021

nopopculture became friends with Ladybug7.
New Friend

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 12/29/2021

nopopculture became friends with Ladybug7.
Alcoholism

My 8 Month Sober Gift

Posted by: nopopculture

Last Reply: Kevin105 01/01/2022

8

I turned 8 months sober yesterday. I was in a Zoom meeting and this girl passed out, probably ODed. She nodded off in the middle of the meeting and we were unable to wake her. She had her full name in her profile, so we looked her up on Instagram and called her. It didn't wake her. Eventually, her friend came and got her out of her coma or whatever. She looked dead. I thought I was looking at a dead woman. We were typing "Call 911" in the chat, but all she did was close the laptop. Her friend...
Little (or not) crush

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 12/17/2021

0

So I have this crush. He's nice, sweet, handsome, and what I want in a guy. Well, except that he's a normie, or maybe "one of us". I can't tell from here. He lives in Philly, and I know that if I go to meet him or if he comes to meet me, he will want to drink and use. It's not a big temptation for me, since my stepdad and his friends drink and use around me all the time, and there's alcohol in the house I live in. I've gotten used to living with it. I go over a friend's house who smokes pot...
Having to be the bigger man

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/28/2021

1

My ex-sponsor keeps showing up in meetings. I leave so that they don't feel bad and go to another meeting. They were my sponsor after I worked steps 1-8 with one sponsor, and I was in the middle of 9. So they were helping me with my 9th step, and I didn't want to make amends to someone that I harmed. I was arrogant and prideful, and they fired me. I caused them harm by bringing up trauma in their life that they didn't want to deal with. I'm willing to make amends to them even though I got...
Why did I quit?

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/13/2021

1

I quit because I wanted to avoid consequences. I got high behind the wheel and I didn't want to get caught. I didn't think my alcoholism and drug use were really a problem, but I didn't want the consequences of a DUI. I went to NA at first, thinking pot was my only problem. Then I realized pills were also an issue, too, after I used them the first night I went to NA. Well, maybe. I don't know exactly when I realized pills were an issue, but I do know that I took opiates after my first night in...
Journal Comment

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/04/2021

nopopculture commented on nopopculture's journal Donated platelets today
Donated platelets today

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/04/2021

2

I did it two times in a row, new record! The iron pills are helping, and so is the T I think. Between the two of them I am able to get my iron up and I'm able to donate. This time I made sure to eat enough before so I didn't feel like passing out. I watched Squid Game while I donated, 3 episodes. It was a bad day if I watched 3 episodes of Netflix. I realized on Halloween I was hiding from the memory of my ex and all they did to me, which is why I binge watched to escape. It's better than the...
Alcoholism

Discussion Comment

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/04/2021

nopopculture commented on the discussion Hi.
New Friend

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/02/2021

nopopculture became friends with bobinmaine.
Joined New Group

Posted by: nopopculture

Posted: 11/02/2021

nopopculture joined the group Codependency.

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