SMRK's Posts | DailyStrength

Status: This was a mistake.

Mood: Ok

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Looking for common ground

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I came to DS a very long time ago. I was grieving the loss of my husband. I got much needed support here. I then attempted to move on with my life. Then I came back recently to try to reach out. This time to find support for the loss of my second...
Preditors on DS

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This has been the longest journey. A never ending road to where? To here. I have been on this website for more then a year now. And out of fear and depression I have accomplished very little. Have had very little to say about this topic. But I am...
Preditors on this site

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This has been the longest journey. A never ending road to where? To here. I have been on this website for more then a year now. And out of fear and depression I have accomplished very little. Have had very little to say about this topic. But I am...
Suicidal Thoughts..........

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u know those things that pass thru the thought process from time to time. That make you stop and think. What exactly am I thinking and why am I thinking it? Those same thoughts when put into words can cause the heart rate to quicken of all who read...
He was an ass

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Why is it people just can't get it. Why is it they just don't or won't understand....When I told some one that my abusive husband. Beat me and strangled me and raped me. And then emotionally and mentally and psycologicly tortured me. Shattered my...
The monsters under the bed....

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Some people call them flashbacks. I call them night mares. These things that come out at me in the night and unravel my very being. A wave of emotions will wash over me and it is as if I am right there in the moment. Reliving the entire episode...
Twisted mind

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I have had my mother on my mind all day today. Did I hate my mom? No. Did I hate the things she did to me. Yes. Can I forgive her for those astrossities. I guess.But I still ask myself why. I was a child. I was inocent. I was vaulerable and could...
Looking inside my diary and myself

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I am going to do something here that I am hoping will be theraputic for myself as well as maybe for others...Maybe give give someone who is seeking answers about their abusive relationship an insight to thier possible future.The following will be...
WTF

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I am not even certain that writting this is in my best interest. And I don't know if it's because of the grieving I am enduring or the depression that has over whelmed me. Or maybe it's the flood of thoughts about all the things that happened when I...
I knew it was coming, now it's here

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It's been there all along. Right under the surface. Like it was laying in wait for me. The flood gates opened and it started pouring out. Everyday getting deeper and deeper. And I knew sooner or later I was going to drownd in it. Something happened...
Can I be any sadder?

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I am trying so hard to get thru my days being as positive as i possibly can. I come here and I talk about all the things that are making my heart ache and my mind tired. I try to keep as much of a sense of humor as I possibly can.I have been so...
Methadone Addiction

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I am hoping that there are those of you here that have had to live with and edure someone addicted to methadone. And I am not refering to buying it on the street. I am refering to a perscription for the medication that went terrible wrong. My...
And the flood gates are open

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I have been scrolling on this site looking and reading. Searching for something to connect with. I have so many issues, it really is quite funny. But this issue incest has caught my attention. I have read many of these entries. And I see a little...
Love and hate at the same time

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I lost the love of my life...who was also my tormentor. He was fun and funny. He was sweet and caring. He was smart and had more charisma then anyone should ever be allowed to have. He knew all the right words and knew when to say them.And in the...