I'd love to give you all advice but I think for me the time was just right. I used lots of visualisation, breathing, distraction, and barriers. All helped. I also take b vits which help too.

Focus, determination and willpower sounds strange, oh and I ate so much food!!

Even now my hand still goes up, am conscious I could lose it xx

Awesome work for you! Hurrah for your continuing success!

I have to reply on your 18 months pf-spree! Wow....
Are you taking the recommended Inositol supplement and NAC? The visualisation and breathing exercises I too have tried with success. These are great for relaxation too. When I go through stress is when I feel the crawling feeling to pull, so working on stress is so helpful.
I 'm glad you are doing so well-congrats!

So glad you're still doing so well. CONGRATS!!!!!!! Stay vigilant :)

Hello all,

A much needed update for me - really was time. Stress is such a trigger for me, and this year oh boy has it been stressful. So I'm in a minor relapse :( I'm hoping I can recognise it and hopefully get on top of it before I become a proper puller again :(

Anyway life was bumbling along as it does...then the week before xmas in torrential rain we get a call to my husband "your mother's had a fall, she's in hospital in S (a town 3 and a half hours away) you need to come" so we think oh maybe broken bones, head injury you know....drive through the night arriving at 3am. Then a night spent waiting for a Dr - the next morning he breaks us the news she will need both legs amputating, she wakes up, consents to surgery. We got for sleep, wake up to the news she has had both legs off above the knee. We visit over xmas, she has days where she is confused, days where she isn't. Then an infection, intensive care and two strokes. Since then she has barely spoke a word. She has no strength, no speech, she gets upset and distressed. We've been caring for her from a distance, driving each week. Its far. She has moved closer now, but longer term recovery is limited. We are looking at a home.

I had to clean up her flat, the home where she fell and lay for days - the smell got into my skin, rotting flesh, shit, piss, rotting food all in one place. Yuk. It was that day I pulled my first hair.

Anyway, so from here I am declaring it must stop.

So PF starting today.

Lots of love girls xxx

I'm so sorry you've had to go through all this. I feel for you in your situation. Have you looked into any resources in your area to help with caregiving for your mother? Its best to get help, going it alone will cost you your health, relationship, and ultimately, the caregiving itself will suffer. Its very stressful dealing with taking care of someone in a sudden situation, sounds like you are doing well so far with not pulling too much.
Remember, you must take care of your needs first, before tackling another, your health and well-being comes first-then you will be able to help your mother in a good spirit and with your health.
Remember to have all your barriers around you when you feel under tension or stress this will help with not pulling. Wearing a hat or scarf, using an ice pack when the crawly feeling starts, having your Lavender essential oil on hand when the crawly feeling starts put directly on the scalp to calm the area. This will also relax you in the evening for sleep. Try and get a brisk walk in daily, this will help with stress and depression-it will ease your troubled mind to a more relaxed you. Just being around nature and getting some fresh air will help tremendously.
I hope you feel better soon.

Sorry for the profanity everyone. But..

Fuuuuuck. I'm so so sorry Mrs. K. That is a truly horrible series of events. I'm so so sad for you all. Your poor mother in law.

I've been going through really terrible family events also. It's a big trigger for pulling. I know how draining being a carer is. And coming to grips with having to place a mother in a home.

I'm glad you're here. Big big hugs. xoxoxo

Mrs. K, I'm sorry that you're facing this hurdle. It's one of the worst lifestyle changes we manage to muddle through. I agree with Nabby to take care of yourself first. You have to, or when the burnout happens, you have zero reserves to refresh, renew, and relax the tension. It's not easy, and the heart aches knowing you cleaned the place of your mother-in-law with the associated smells. Please know we are all proud of you for keeping the pulling to a minimum. Stay strong.

Hugs., So glad to have you here.

That sounds so stressful! Stay strong! xo

Hi there mrs. K., I haven't been on in a long time but wanted to say hi, so I'm dredging up your post from page 3. Congrats on doing so well with your pulling. You're inspiring. I am so sorry to hear about your more recent update and I hope you have found some healing since then. Thinking of you...

Hi guys,

I'm really sorry to have been absent for such a long time - but this year hasn't been great for us. My mother in law was severely ill for the first few months of 2013, and we were traveling 3 hours there and 3 hours back to visit her in hospital for weeks - so exhausting and you know fatigue lets the pulling demons in! She died in April so I have since then been supporting my husband in grieving for his mum, getting her flat ready for selling and generally dealing with the stress and bureaucracy of death.

Anyway, my pulling has escalated - I'm not as bad as I was when I first arrived here in early 2012 but I'm pulling daily and its horrible, I'm getting noticeable hair loss again :(

I really want to get back under control - I feel like when life is OK I can be in control but anything upsets the boat and Bam! Pulling!

So I'm back and I'm trying xxx

Ah It's ok of course. Did miss you lots though!

So sorry to hear about your 2013. Sounds like my 2012! Not exactly the same of course but many similarities. I totally get you when you say that when all's well, pulling can be controlled easily ish, but when things are stressful and unstable then it gets so much harder. I too have noticeable damage again. Ahh sucks.

This is a great place to be when you're getting back to being pull free. You can do it. I know it, you know it. Patience and persistence. Be kind to yourself.

Thanks love, I will try to be back more often (my laptop died last year as well. I think I almost mourn it more the MIL!!)

But I have inherited her computer so I am back online more now. xxxxxxx

So far - 1 hour pull free. I'm literally counting minutes.

Oh yes it's like that in the beginning. Keep persisting! Deep breathing helped ne get through day 1 this time.

Oh dear computer loss. Glad you're back online:)

Nice to see you here again. I'm sorry for your loss, and can empathize. My Dad died in March, and my mother-in-law died 12 days later, and then my mum went into the hospital for 2 months. Not that I'm trying to one-up you :-), just saying I know how rough it can be, but also how we can find the strength to get through it. I went through a difficult time when I didn't even try to be PF, but things are looking better now.

Persevere. Know that you can do it.