khardeman

Well, Im alive feeling a bit better then yesterday. Need to stop drinking, I figure its time to start feeling at least a little bit. My husband would not have wanted me to be unhappy. He always said...

Today started out ok I guess. I seem to sleep soundly, but only for about 5 to 6 hours. My mother in law sent me another e-mail today saying she was sorry, so once again I felt better. Then I don't...

Thank God, My mother in law e-mailed me back and said she was "sort of sorry' that is about as far as apoligies get in this family. I cried and cried when I saw the e-mail, this woman has been just...

Yesterday was a prety good day as far as they go these days, until I received this hateful e-mail from my mother in law. She has been like my own mother since mine passed away 4 years ago. She was...

I am feeling a little better today. I requested a few extra days off from work. I just wasn't ready yet to face al the people on my commuter bus and the people at work. I have kept myself so busy...

Not one call from anyone today to say Merry Christmas, with the exception of one of my husbands old work friends. I feel like I have a plaque everyone is scared of geting.

My biggest problem, and i wish someone could tell me they understand, I feel guilty for doing things I always did like playing games on my computer, or even sitting down to watch a TV show. I feel I...

I am dong pretty good today. Woke up a little early, but thta's alright, my big 100 pound dog was laying at my side and the other one at the bedside waiting on her breakfest bicuit wagging away. My...

I woke up this morning and for the first time since Bill has passed he wasn't the first thing I thought about. It was so fucking cold in the house, I like a dummy forgot to turn the heater on when I...

I kept myself pretty busy today. Still trying to clean up some of the junk my husband had laying all over the house.  He was a pac rat to the highest degree. I went out and met a new friend for a...

I am doing a little better each day. The tears have stopped at least for the moment. I still keep cussing him out for leaving me and my emotions go up and down with the sun and the moon. I seem to do...

Took a few more pills then I should have, no not that many. I took one then an hour later took another, and then another, jusy so I could sleep. I spent most of the day sleeping until 3 when my grand...

I had a friend come over just to keep me company last night, He lived 60 miles away and didn't get here until after 1 in the morning. We were up all night talking until I couldn't keep my eyes open....

Its December 20th, I seem to be missing days. I had to go pick up my husbands ashes today. I had purchased at the time of the funeral arrangements a necklace that holds some of the ashes. Its...

I just don't where to start or end. My husaband of only 50 passed while I was on a business trip just last week. I have limited family and friends. My grandaughter is with me now, but of course the...