FallenAngel

I lost my husband, best friend and lover 10 years ago to a massive heart attack.  In all these years that have passed I have not been able to fill the hole left in my heart by his passing.  I still...

I've been doing so well the last couple of weeks but woke up today feeling sad and on the verge of tears.  I'm at work and can barely function.  Just want to go home and crawl back in bed, but that...

Well, still doing well. The change in meds and diet has worked wonders for me.  Now if I could just start walking again I'd be very happy.  It's rainy and dreary here in Maryland and my commute...

Well, I've changed my routine up a lot lately and all is going well.  I've started taking my medicines (Pristiq and Abilify) at night rather than in the morning and I've gotten on a better diet. ...

This has been, without a doubt, one of the worst starts to the new year than I could even have imagined.  I'm tired, I'm lonely, I'm sick of this fucking weather and I just want to curl up and go to...

Crying, lonely, depressed, anxious.  All words to describe my day and night. 

Well, I just passed the five year anniversary of Gene's death.  Although it has gotten much easier to deal with the loss, I still miss him everyday and he will always hold a special place in my...

Dear Gene,Even after three years of your being gone, I still think of you every day.  There is always something that reminds of you no matter where I am.  Just the smell of coffee brings a small...

Well, I called Mike back tonight and he felt really bad when I told him about Gene.  He, like everyone else, simply didn't know what to say and all I could tell him was that that was okay.  I hung...

Thought I've been doing so well.  Then I come home today and there is a message on my phone for Gene from an old friend of his that doesn't know that he died.  I have totally lost it now.  Don't...

Well, I made it through the third anniversary of Gene's death.  I did take the day off from work and gave myself a big pity party.It still hurts so much somedays I just have to let it all out. 

Oh, how I'm missing Gene this morning.  Crying and crying, it just doesn't stop.  So much going on and the one strength in my life gone forever.  I just want to curl up in bed and cry my eyes...

I got laid off from work on Thursday.  Reduction in force they called it.  I knew it was coming but didn't really think it would be so soon.  I was just starting to get busy and, bam, came out of...

Today is one of those days when I'm so tired of being sad from missing Gene so much that I don't know how much more I can take.  If it weren't for my son, I don't know what I would do.  I've been...

Someone asked me this question today.  All I could say was that I wasn't ready and don't know that I ever will be.  I'm still married in my mind.  The love of my life may be gone, but he still...