Ellocin

Okay...so now I'm confused. So in my Broken and Torn entry yesterday I wrote about the messages I thought I was getting and that I mentioned them to this person and we were both going to pray on...

Okay, I don't know if God is trying to tell me something or not but I'm awake again after less then 3 hours of sleep feeling basically like I've slept all night.  If He has a message for me I am not...

I don't know if the Lord is sending me the messages I am getting or if it is attacks from Satan.  I'm feeling that I am to distance myself from a person who I have been clinging to for guideance in...

I didn't want to believe until my Pastor said that it could be the depression that is why I am feeling so lost.  But what he said made sense and helped bring a little bit of calm back into my...

Decided the best way for me to write in my journal today is just copy and paste today's email communication I've had with my pastor.  I will edit out both of our names to just our first initial....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRWWat_cfeY The words in this song (well, the words as they are in English, I can't read the captions) are how I want to feel with God, but as it stands right now, I...

So I decided if God doesn't want me and wants to turn his back on me like he did the other day...then why do I want him.  I don't want a friend who hurts me like that...I"m better off with no...

Copied this from an email I got.  It made me laugh, hoping it does you too!    One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the...

i think I figured out part of why I can't find Him again. First, I never realized how mad I was at God for yesterday and all the feelings because of that. Mad because I couldn't find Him, mad He...

Yesterday I was feeling awful and lost.  In an attempt to get away from those feelings I over medicated.  Used Ativan to knock me out through the day....and took a little extra of my sleeping meds...

had a really good weekend and really got to spend some good quality time with my heavenly Daddy....but today I am feeling like a kid lost in a department store...an empty one at that...screaming and...

Today is another day of trudging throuh molasses.  At least I finally had my shower but it was kind of pointless...feeling all gross and sweaty again now.  Didn't even realize we were so low on...

It was well after 8am when I finally fell asleep.  I think maybe I need to take my celexa earlier for awhile...I think the increased dose isn't helping the whole sleep thing.  I'm told it can keep...

i'm not feeling so good tonight...it's 4am and i'm still awake... i can't figure out if it's because i can't sleep or if i'm in one of those moods were i don't want to sleep...i just kind of feel...

Hey, forgot to give an update on life as I know it yesterday.    Feeling better yesterday and even had the energy to walk to my psychiatrist appointment (about 15 min)...downhill.  LOL.  As I...