Okay...so now I'm confused. So in my Broken and Torn entry yesterday I wrote about the messages I thought I was getting and that I mentioned them to this person and we were both going to pray on them. Well, that is fine and the conclussion....this isn't a message from either but of the flesh.  This should've been a simple answer, conclusion, whatever....but I have never thought of the "flesh" as something seperately.  To me it has always been either God or Satan, good or bad, black or white.  So then to find out of this third factor to consider (gray area if you will) just makes me more confused. I know I have low self-esteem and think lowly of myself at times.  I know I think most people are too good for me...and I work hard to tell myself those thoughts are not true.  I've always thought it was lies from Satan.  And now I'm questioning...is that just my thoughts?  The sinful me, which is what I'm told the "flesh" is.  Do I really think *that* lowly of myself without any help from Satan.  And why would I even think such thoughts and for so long.  Do I really hold that much self-hate inside myself?   Who am I to even think someone is too good for me, that I don't deserve their time more then the next person, that I am not good enough for their friendship, wisdom, their insights.  This isn't just about this one person.  This is how I think about many different people.  I think often times these things even before I know someone.  I see them and automatically I "know" that I'm so far beneath them.  Where did I ever come up with this stuff?!  This is insane!  Who am I to judge anyone, ANYONE, including myself?!?  Who am I to place people (myself and/or others) on different levels.   Is this really who I have become over my 26 years of life?!  I'm so confused.  I never knew how much I didn't know about who I am or who I have become.   And that is not the person I want to be.  The Lord knows I have so much to learn.  This past week, or maybe more now, has felt like literally years.