So since I lied in my husband's eyes, and did not inform him of me changing my mind about going to a meeting, I am back to Day 1. So here's to Day 1 being lie free.

Thanks for all the inspiration, encouragement and words of wisdom. They are appreciated and necessary.

I'm Lucy, so far today I've been honest, and I'm checking in.

I am moving out of my house of 23 years. I've been divorced for 3 years and my kids are grown and moved "on". Talk about old baggage/memories/ and a boat load of sh-t!! HA. It feels so good to free up space and energy!! Metaphorically I am moving on. This is day 57 of checking in on this site. As I sit in the almost empty shell of this dwelling I am reminded that hiding my interactions with my Ex from my current partner was a motivator for me to lie. I thought that I would hurt someone's feelings if I were truthful. I had to be perfect. I was scared of rejection and abandonment. The work I have been doing precedes the last 57 days!! I wouldn't be where I am now if I had just started on this journey. I have come to an understanding that it is ok to be imperfect. I cannot protect everyone's feelings. I am enough and I am capable of my own happiness. I am at a point here where I think the next appropriate device in my move from this house is going to be a commercial dumpster and everything else that resides in this space is going into said dumpster!! I also think this applies to my old way of thinking. All those insecurities and I am not enoughs are going to be tossed out! There is no need to hang on to them anymore!! Love the down sizing!! Anyone need about 20 mismatched glasses, pantry full of can goods with experation dates from 2008, clothes that haven't been worn in 15 years....?

Starting again after a relapse - hello day one !

Checking in. Recognition is part of the process!

It's always day one.

I'm John and I'm a liar.

Day 2 and 3 were lie free. Told some truths to hubby about our situation (hard truths about what he choosing to do and what they mean to our relationship) and as long as things stay as they are we will never be able to heal us. He's considering moving out. Fuh!!! Needed God's word after this convo and this is what popped up, sorry for non religious people but...Pslam 34:18 "The LORD is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Doesn't fix anything but I just have to trust in Him that something good,perfect and wonderful will come from the hell I'm living in! Beaten, broke down and abandoned puppy kind of a day. I feel like one of those dogs in the ASCPA commercials.

Checking in today after a relaxing weekend, hit a rough spot for about 30 minutes Saturday night, but the night ended on a high note. Happy Monday everyone.

I'm Lucy and I lie. Day three of not lying today. Not easy but I'm working on it.

Great morning all...Days 36-38 went very well, no lies told...the weekend with myself and my lady went well, questions are still being asked and answering truthfully without hesitation. I will share this with your when your are sharing the whole truth be mindful that there times that will test your truth. My example..one person who's knows that I am in a relationship was seen at a dance event on Friday where we attended. The line dance community is huge but small if you know what I mean and more often than not you will always see individuals at certain events - and this is magnified as I am an instructor and have been for the last 12 years so I have taught and attended many events and my number is listed on our website and have been given out for different groups and people.. There is a past history with this person that my lady knows about and have made it known to this individual as well. We spoke cordially at the event Friday night - no issue. Saturday Night while my lady and I were watching television at her place at 10 pm, this person decides to call...i answered, she asked was she disturbing me to which I answered I am watching tv with my lady. She asked me some line dance related questions, thanked me and hung up. So of course my lady asked my who it was and I told her, when I said the name she asked why was she calling...she was sitting right next to me during the entire conversation and heard my responses. She felt that she called for another reason, which is her right considering our current situation..but my point is that I stayed in my truth to which she even stated YOUR answers were fine.

I share this because because there WILL be those times (either known or unknown, purposeful or not) where truth will be tested. 40 days days ago I cannot say that I would have been in the mindset to handle such a situation...but know I can because I choose to...good bad or indifferent truth is truth...and I am so glad that I passed the test. This is why I say to you all, don't give up on your truth...it can be done!

#Keep Pounding!

Logan, great point!! If you only commit murder 1% of the time you are still a murderer. Truth is truth. Stay commited to this wholehearted life and the internal rewards pay with dividends it seems. Checking in.

Checking in. Bad weekend. Hopeful for a better Monday. When questions fly in fast and furious, it can be very challenging to keep patience and composure in order to be steadfast in truth, and sometimes in my wife's anger and frustration she stops giving me the time to compose myself so that i can speak honestly. I know that that last statement just sounded like I blamed my wife for my lying to her on the weekend, but it's really not. It's an indication that there is still lots of work to do.

Melissalem... get back on that horse.

1Cor1378... "... testing of your faith produces perseverance [so] let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James1:3,4

Hello - My name is David and I'm a liar.

checking in, it's Tuesday, third therapy visit tonight.

Checking in. I'm John, and I'm a liar.