Alliegator

I just bawled my eyes out after a One Tree HIll episode.  It hurts for me to watch daughters getting along with their moms and having a close relationship.  I really want that in my life but I know...

Movies always make me cry.  Not for the reason most people cry: the plot is sad.  Rather for me every time I see a character experience pain it makes me think of my pain.  When I see a happy...

I'm currently sitting in my common room at my dorm with my friends.  I am able to detach myself from the situation I am in and I realize how I have so much pain and anguish inside me but I use the...

My thoughts and moods are so all over the place I can't even figure them out anymore.  I kind of feel like my body is defecting and falling apart inside.  I'm worried that I may be going crazy. I...

I have been having the urge lately to do something I am not supposed to do.  I have wanted to cut but I told myself that if I didn't cut for a year I would get a tattoo (something I have wanted for...

So today I woke up happy for the first time in along time.  Usually I wake up numb with a sense of dread of having to go through another day.  Today was different!  I actually feel happy and not...

I hate that at the end of the day when I'm getting ready for bed I always review my day and worry about if I have made an ass out of myself.  I end up regretting things I've said or done.  I know...

I really wish that I was pretty.

I don't know what's wrong with me anymore.  I feel like I'm barely holding on to sanity.  I really wish I had someone to talk to but I don't like my therapist here at school.

Well I think I have i officially relapsed into some sort of eating disorder. I definitely eat but I count calories and I haven't eaten more than 1,700. I know that sounds like a lot of food but I...

I am so sick of dreading tomorrow.  Every day I put of going to sleep because I know that as soon as I wake up I am just going to have to push myself through one more long boring day.  I don't want...

I have so much going on in real life and inside my read right now.  I don't know what to do.  Sometimes reality doesn't even feel real.  I wish I could experience real emotions. I feel sruface...

I'm not doing well at all.  I am definitely relapsing into anorexia.  Part of me is scared to have the disorder take control again and another part of me is scared not to.  

I'm struggling a lot with my weight right now.  I feel fat and I don't like my body.  I just want to work out constantly and I feel guilty every time I eat.  I know I need to stay healthy but I'm...