I don't count hairs that just come out while playing with it...although there is such a fine line between that and pulling that we need to be aware of. Those bad days just happen sometimes, but you will get through it and it will get easier again. You have come so far already, you are definitely able to fight off these urges - keep doing what you know works for you!

Thanks Manda!

you can do this..
YOU ARE doing it .. !! well done. I always find when my hair is greasy , its more tempting to play with, obviously in my case, i need to wash it more.. haha
rewards can be the amazing feeling we get from not pulling - sometimes that enough.. no, maybe thats where i go wrong. day 50, reward yourself with a lovely walk in nature or watching a good movie or seeing a good friend for a walk, drink etc (i think if you think of it as a reward, it feels nicer.. but then maybe thats where i go wrong too.. ?!) ..
anyway, only 6 days to go til day 50..
keep up the good work missy..
can you see any new growth ?

Thanks so much luleee. I don't know, my hair was freshly washed yesterday and I engaged in the sane behavior as the day before.

I have to take care of myself! And rewards are included in that. I never rewarded myself for 6 weeks pf. I would NEVER not give someone else a reward I promised them, why is it ok to do that to myself? I don't have a very strong commitment to myself.

45 days pull free. Eek.

You MUST reward yourself for the upcoming 50 day milestone! Would it help to plan in advance exactly what the reward will be, choose a specific time to do it, put aside the money for it, or whatever else you could do to make it as definite as possible? Maybe mark it on a calender or tell someone else about it? Just ideas....

Congrats on 45 days!! That's really amazing and you're right it's not ok to do that to yourself! You more than deserve a reward. I like Manda's ideas of planning ahead in detail and maybe telling other people about it..

I'm going to try to follow your example and just kick trich's butt! :D

Good idea Manda. I've popped it in the diary on my phone. I'm planning a relaxing read in the park by the river, or if it's rainy then in a cafe. A relaxing bath with my special stuff. Delicious dinner and champagne, whether at home or out.

Thanks lien!! Just keep trying til you find that extra spark of motivation, and that thing that makes it easier for you.

I'm starting a "play-free-thon" because I want to focus on that too. We'll see if it's useful.

46 days pull free
0 days play free

Oh and lulee re: growth, yes! The thin patch on the top left of my head has thickened up heaps. It's almost fully grown in, just a few teeny thin patches. There's one bald spot that's tiny on the front of my head, refusing to grow back. It's so teeny, like smaller than a pea.

Your ideas for a reward sound awesome! Good luck with the play free a thon!

"a relaxing read in the park by the river" sounds like heaven!! :)

Hehe thanks! I'm getting much better at realizing what I value thanks to my little book where I write three things I've done for myself that day.

Ugh I indulged in "the behaviour" yesterday as well! 3rd day doing it. I reach up and magically find a loose hair and out it comes. Or I search for loose hairs that come out when I pet them. SO BAD and I would say that it could even be called pulling. I'm going to try extra hard today to bring my hands down and breathe and think positive thoughts. Blah!

We naturally loose so many hairs a day that I really wouldn't count this as pulling, but you're right that "this behaviour" is dangerous and can lead to actually pulling.. Maybe use some extra barriers/reminders if possible today.
Deep breathing, you can do this girl!! :)
Hugs! xx

Those borderline pulling behaviors are so much harder to stop than actual pulling! Maybe extra barriers for a few days would help to break that habit? Ugh I wish I had better suggestions, but I have the same problem. Still, you are doing a great job of not actually pulling, so you are allowing regrowth to happen and saving lots of hairs.

Mm could be an idea. I have barely indulged in it at all today, and no hairs have come out in the very short amount of time (seconds) that I've allowed myself to play. I'll see how I go for the rest of today and tomorrow.

And yes you're right! Thanks :)

oooh la laaaa that sounds great! relax away, you deserve it! :)