MJ46
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- I was here a lot for the first year or two after my wife was killed on a car wreck. I drifted away as many do when the time is right for them. The five year anniversary was Feb 3, and I have been meaning to share a few things I picked up over these...
- Heard this on the radio this morning, attributed to Nancy Reagan " You look forward to strolling down memory lane, you just don't expect to do it alone"
- With a load of shared memories (45 years worth) and the one who shared them gone, It's hard not to try to share them with others, many who don't give a crap and are just indulging an old fart. I try too keep a lid on this sharing and at the same I...
- Has anyone read the Buddhist parable of Kisa Gotami and her dead child? I have found it very helpful to restore my perspective when I am having one of those "poor me " days.
- Since the death of my wife I have been working on some of my negative personality traits and behaviors that she used to point out to me. Things like holding on to anger, having to prove that I was right even when it didn't matter and so on....
- Last night I had a very real dream that my cell phone was ringing. I answered once and no one answered. It rang a second time and a voice said "This is Pat(my wife) how are you? I woke up and had been crying in my sleep. That never happened before...
- I have started dating a widow who is a wonderful person. It feels so nice to do couple things again and to have companionship. When we are together, most of the time I feel like a normal happy human. The thing that's in the back of my mind is that...
- Does anyone know an easy way to stop third class mail, mostly catalogs addressed to my wife. She got her name on a lot of lists.
- Things have been going fairly well for me lately, but today I had a reminder that pain is still just hiding around the corner. My wife's accident was on Feb 3, a Sunday .While sorting through a kitchen cabinet I found one of her 7 day pill holders...
- At the suggestion of someone on this site I got the book "Seven Choices" by Elizabeth Neeld. I thought the book was very helpful. One of the things the author mentioned was a 9 month setback being fairly common. I have been feeling more sad and...
- I'm at 7 months and just recently started having dreams about my wife who passed on Feb3 and my dad who died a month before. I think this is part of my mind sorting things out. For some reason this was blocked for 7 months and now it's starting to...
- An old friend called yesterday and when we were talking he mentioned some event we attended many years ago. My memory of the experience was so different from his. How I missed having my wife to confirm or correct my recollection. Half my brain is...
- Saturday was 6 months. The hardest things for me are the constant reminders I call the missing magic, grief counselors call them secondary losses. The mail magically appeared on the kitchen table every day, now when I take it out of the box it...
- A lot of my motivation for stuff used to be to make my wife happy. She was always glad to see a neatly cut lawn or the sticks in the yard picked up. It was not my thing and something I put off until asked.The first few times I did yard work it...
- A question for those who are further along than me(3 months). Does there come a time when you can look at a tree and not think she planted that and get sad. Or look at the wall and think I hung that picture for her and she's not here to enjoy it. Do...