falseface

Status: Numbness is bliss

Mood: Bad

Offline

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When my time comes

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"I dreamed I was missingYou were so scaredBut no one would listenCause no one else caredAfter my dreamingI woke with this fearWhat am I leavingWhen I'm done hereSo if you're asking me I want you to knowWhen my time comesForget the wrong that i've...
should i tell my mom?

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since i joined DS i've been playing with the idea of telling my family what's going on with me. my mom lives a few towns over and she's visiting for a couple of days. i want to tell her what's going on but i'm afraid of her reaction. i know she...
Who knows

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Who knows why we were chosen to become like this. Is genetic...the sins of the fathers. Will our sons be held responsible for our sins and become the same monsters as we are? The world existed before we became and it will exist long after we have...
maybe i should just disappear

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I have thought about ending my life so many times I've lost count, but I'm too chicken to do it. I'm just sitting here, at home, everyone is out with friends and I'm stuck with the baby because "it's too cold outside". Don't get me wrong. I love...
Thnx everyone

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Thnx for sharing your music with me. I work with music everyday and I have learned a lot from you. Music is the language of the soul and if it cannot be expressed it will wither and die. Have a great one. Hugs.
i need it

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i though the day was starting out fine. but like always, i'm starting to feel very low and i can't wait to get into town to grab some stuff to eat. lots of it!!!
i can feel it coming on

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I've learnt to be wary of days that start out 'great'. It usually only lasts a few hours and then I'm so down. I can fee it starting. i'm already sad and so worn out i don't have the energy to do anything. but i have to find it somehow, my son...
What's in your cd player now?

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Music has been in my life for as long as I can remember. It's a good way to vent, so I'm just curious about what other people listen to. Maybe I can learn something new. Anyway, hope everybody has a great day.
just venting

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This is so messed up. I wish I could be a better person. Stronger. I hate feeling so helpless. Why can't I just get up and get better? Why do I have to feel this way? I have a friend who has a biological father (who's kind of estranged), an...
Reality sucks

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I can't deal with reality. I've never been able to. I've just realized this and it scares me. Dealing with depression and ocd is bad enough, but my world is so twisted. I never know what is real and what not. Lately I've been going 'off line',...
anxiety

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I am so worried. The other night I had a very bad dream in which I lost the one person that holds my heart in his hands. Tomorrow he has to go on a very long trip and I can't shake this anxious feeling I have about it. I hide it from him because...

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