M3NTALLYLOST

I’m scared of going to work tonight. I have a meeting with upper level rank, they work 8am till 5pm and I work 11pm till 7am. I had to push my surgery back. I do not know if this meeting is a slap...

My life is in excessive turmoil at the moment each and every aspect. I am trying to take the view point of this is the largest collective set of test I have ever faced. I will take each test one at a...

SI-punishment-misery-self blame- are they all the same???So I'm sleeping and my aunt wakes me up when the kids do something she can't handle... seven year old boy pulls down my twelve year old girls...

I keep calling the anesthesiologist department at the hospital where my surgery will hopefully be, just to ask more questions. I think they know my voice now. The best thing in the world they could...

The Surgery – well I cannot move the bar backwards past zero, but I need to. When I got my tattoo last week I helped the artist put the dressing on and tape it. The next few days I had forgotten...

http://dailystrength.org/c/Rape/forum/5862923-10-words-less  So powerful I wanted to keep my answer here. I’m reply #8.  Wow… how integrity… Describe who you are in 10 words or less. At first...

Surgery – no change.Weight – no change.Recovery – no change. Self-Injury – I did not show any one my arm at work. This is good for me. I want to play with it the more I see it. So I washed...

Well I did it, I put myself out there, I made the Goals (aka – Put my weakness out there.) I hope this helps.

I have skipped three surgeries due to fear of anesthesia or lost of time and control. I knew before I had my children that I only wanted two of my own, and would adopt or foster many more. I have...

I can not “go” places like most people, like the “Jones,” I took the kids to SixFlags and had to leave two different ride lines because of “people watching, judging, going to get me, and...

I know I got this big to get out of the military. I know I stayed this size to keep from being raped again (who wants a “fat-a**” right)(It was my fault I was raped – I thought). Zero...

This is my first shot at a goal. I woke up and saw my tattoo. I know I went to get it and it took 3 hours to get. I know I felt better last night, but the guilt is already back. I do not get relief...

Rape area update – called a new counselor, and got my mom to order the “DYM” book for me. Depression area – over all up/down/up day feeling good makes me sadder. Self-Injury area – FAIL...

I updated all my Group Profiles today, I would like to think this is a way of putting my recovery in some sort of perspective. I do not know which is the biggest problem, probably my rape and guilt,...

I know it says Christmess I saw that in another thread and loved it, but it is over ... till next year.