crazyeyedkillah

whats the point of love if its never permanent? why all i feel is pain what i do to be deserving it? all this hurt and shit im tired of my heart being burnt to a crisp. feeling dead inside and i dont...

how can i really be alive if i feel as though ive been murdered? how can people tell me not to play with toys when i have a fetish for knives and blood? pain is about all i know. ive been in pain for...

how am i even supposed to go about recovering from my situation. feel so lost and alone. i feel so dead and cold inside. the only thing that keeps me going is drinking. and especially now since...

over the past 2 days ive been doing nothing but partying and drinking. i found a new best friend...the drink is called purple jesus. its everclear with spite and purple koolaid and it fucks you up....

litsening to the song that describes my life "Down In A Hole" from Alice In Chains....i need a fucking drink. i cant wait till later so i can drink my pain goodbye for the day

only reson im anxious and sorta in a good mood is cause...IM GETTIN FUCKED UP TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but after today ima feel like fuckin shit again because drinking is only a temporary...

when i fall asleep tonight,i hope i never ever wake up.

all i ever wanted was for someone to love me and for me to love them and to never get hurt ever again. she just emailed me wondering how i am...why even bother? how do you mend a heart thats been...

it seems like my life is getting worse and worse everyday. first the girl i love(..well now loved because after what she did and said to me i can no longer feel love for someone like that.) breaks up...

will my heart allways ache with pain? does life have a blade with my name? am i on this earth just for my brain and blood to become stains or is this the first push to become ashes from the flames?...

i dont even really know what  to write..i just feel sad

i wish i had susan smith or andrea yates for a mother...at least they had the courtusey to kill them when they were babies rather then treat them like shit every chance they could my mom is like the...

i feel like complete shit. i dont know what to do with my life anymore. i feel like its the end of the world for me. nobody loves me...she doesnt love me anymore after almost 3 years she shatters my...

just got back from putting in the application. i really need this job. i feel so cold broken and alone maybe if i had a job it would remove alot of my pain from my mind. i could REEEEEEEEEALLLLLLLY...

im going to apply to this factory today..im actually going to leave in a little bit. i really hope i can get this job and be on the first step to turning my life around. its some factory or some...