burningman
Status: Peaceful mindfulness through meditation, focus & awareness.
Mood:
Ok
Offline
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I feel as though I've descended through moderation on the way to perhaps abstinence. The twelve steps remain a good intended expectation, but not yet proved feasible beyond expectations. Truth be...
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I've been thinking about a career redirection, Got into this one by accident, looking back,perhaps a bit naive and my victim fetish now says, against my will. My last career change was 17 years, my...
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not pefect yet though. No miseries. Even went down familiar travels of temptation but yielded not. Went to bed sober, on time & with a fist pump. Yesterday, I had another needed jolt of positive...
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because of the day/night before. There have been brief episodes of success and twice weekly episodes of miserable regrets. I've stumbled along this path of cold turkey. In some ways I am becoming a...
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i began again after only four days. the faltering didnt bother me at all. Why? I wasn't being sneaky. To often my consumption was an act of decei. I need to control the dishonesty & become a better...
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i woke up this moring not knowing which day this was. I've slept better, exercised a bit more, and am reading/writing nearly incessantly. What else have I been missing? There is still money in the...
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Booze Brain tested Resolve. At least twice anyways. Both rationalizations were deflected. Instead, spent time reading, writing & walking. Today, back into the world of work. Tolerance is a test...
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Good intentions are tragic failures. So today, I am silently, as I do everyday, starting again. Today's twist is no coffee, then no alcohol. One may be a gateway to the next. Time will tell. It...
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The day got better than it started. Essential seasonal & necessary chores were done. First thing, the clutter for cash initiative continues. Sold two unneeded items for a good price. this Craigslist...
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I picked up a grudge yesterday, No one else knows about it. Then tried to drown it with alcohol. That didn't work. It's here on this morning after the night before. My boss called me out for having...
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The liquid demon has won. But no longer. I must stop stop pretending to be a better man than I am. I slink around to hidden bottles. Nips are purchased & pocketed. when I'm alone, I drink them...
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Coffee in hand again. No hangover. Even if there was one, my penance would be to live through the pain as a reminder of my own weakness. I am powerless over alcohol, this facet of my life has...
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We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable. All of my problems lie within the self. Turning to an external source or resource is denial.
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I admit that I am powerless over alcohol -- my life has become in manageable. There are Lot of caveats here. the first absolute is that there no absolutes. My my first goal is to eliminate...