chemtrooper

Activity

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  Journal Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 10/31/2017

  chemtrooper commented on chemtrooper's journal Disconnected

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  Disconnected

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 10/22/2017

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  I've had several good days here lately, talking face to face or over the phone with friends.  Not to mention, I haven't touched Facebook in a month.  Why do I still feel so disconnected from everyone?  I sought them out for comfort and they were more than happy to listen to me.  Yet, when I am with them and around them, there is a foreboding feeling that, eventually I will have to leave them and go back to being alone.  My wife and I are talking more, but the fighting and detachment...

• Breakups & Divorce
  

  I don't know what to do anymore.

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Last Reply: movingon2016 10/20/2017

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  I've been married 17 years to a faithful, loving wife; unfortunately, I wasn't as faithful early on in our marriage, yet she has stayed.  I asked her why recently and she replied that she doesn't know.  In couple's therapy, she broke down when we talked about our early years and we've both known that's been a big elephant in the room.  Every time we reopen the case, the shame and guilt take me over.  It is at this point in my life that I need to decide whether or not I should leave.  We...

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  My personality

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/26/2017

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  I took an Enneagram and a traditional personality test and learned that I am a 5w4 with an INTP personality.  So many things are beginning to make sense with how I live life, interact with others, and interpret my worldview.  This information has yielded much to reflect on.

• Sex / Pornography Addiction
  

  Discussion Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/26/2017

  chemtrooper commented on the discussion I need to build a support network.

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  New Friend

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/25/2017

  chemtrooper became friends with amdro.

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  New Friend

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/25/2017

  chemtrooper became friends with amdro.

• Sex / Pornography Addiction
  

  Discussion Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/25/2017

  chemtrooper commented on the discussion I need to build a support network.

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  My heart hurts...literally!

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/24/2017

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  How can I say that I will be ok, regardless of the outcome, when my heart quite literally hurts because I cannot let her go?  I can't let her go, it hurts worse just to think about it.  The meds make me feel like a zombie and I feel numb, inside and out.  We talk about a future with an us, but so much time has passed, with so much left unsaid.  I feel alone, still laying in bed next to her.  We talk, but the damage is done.  I was desperate to be heard and confided in another friend.  As...

• Sex / Pornography Addiction
  

  I need to build a support network

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Last Reply: Seamus 10/02/2017

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  I've been struggling to stay focused on recovery since discovering a new trigger.  My relationship has become a huge stressor as of late and I am back to self medicating with porn.  What I've failed to do is build a support network, therefore, I'm reaching out to this community for anyone willing to encourage and share with me.

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  New Friend

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/23/2017

  chemtrooper became friends with amitheonly1.

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  New Friend

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/23/2017

  chemtrooper became friends with amitheonly1.

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  Journal Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/23/2017

  chemtrooper commented on chemtrooper's journal Introspection

• Sex / Pornography Addiction
  

  Discussion Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/23/2017

  chemtrooper commented on the discussion Christian married woman.

• Sex / Pornography Addiction
  

  Discussion Comment

  Posted by: chemtrooper

  Posted: 09/23/2017

  chemtrooper commented on the discussion Christian married woman.