Hepatitis C Support Group
Hepatitis C is a blood-borne viral disease which can cause liver inflammation, fibrosis, cirrhosis and liver cancer. The hepatitis C virus (HCV) is spread by blood-to-blood contact with an infected person's blood. Many people with HCV infection have no symptoms and are unaware of the need to seek treatment. Hepatitis C infects an estimated 150-200 million people worldwide.
The female golfer came in from her round on the course. The golf pro asked her how she did.
"Terrible. I got stung by a wasp!"
"Where'd it sting you?"
"Between the first and second hole."
"Well I can tell you right off, your stance is too wide."
"Terrible. I got stung by a wasp!"
"Where'd it sting you?"
"Between the first and second hole."
"Well I can tell you right off, your stance is too wide."
I'm excited about Thanksgiving because I love unwelcome parenting advice from relatives I see twice a year.
Thanksgiving is great because people tend to speak less when food is lodged in their mouths.
You have to smoke a couple of bowls before Thanksgiving dinner. I can't think of a better time to have the munchies.
There is a special place in hell for people that play Christmas music before Thanksgiving.
Dear Turkeys, don't worry... they only love us for our breasts too. Sincerely, women.
I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldnt the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium.
You don't need Thanksgiving to hate your family.
If I was a turkey, Id be doing everything I could to taste terrible right now.
On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment ..... halftime.
My aunt is bringing her homemade cranberry sauce to our Thanksgiving dinner, and my uncle is bringing his blatant racism!
They should change the name of Thanksgiving to something more fitting like say, Turkeypocolypse or Stuffing-cide.
Want to really freak someone out? Add 2 extra turkey legs to the turkey when its in the oven.
Happy Turkey Day, America! Dont forget to name the turkey and make everyone uncomfortable.
Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often. - Johnny Carson
The butcher asks if she'd like to try some damn ham.
The preacher's wife is shocked. The butcher explains that "Dam Ham" is the brand name of the meat and shows her the packaging with the beaver and dam logo.
That night, the preacher asks, "What's for dinner?"
His wife says she bought some damn ham from the butcher. The preacher scolds his wife for using such language in their home. She explains the "Dam Ham brand name and their logo.
At the dinner table, the preacher asks his 16-year-old son to pass him the "Dam Ham."
The son replies, "I'll pass the damn ham if you pass me the muthaf@ckin' mashed potatoes."
Too many coats on the bed.
When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice.
What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control?
A trip without the kids.
Mushroom says, "But I'm a 'fun guy.'"
Bartender says, "I just said we don't serve fungi."
Mushroom says, "No, no, not 'fungi,' 'fun guy.' I made a pun."
Bartender says, "Get the fuck out of my bar."
Park your car, man.
THUNDERPANTS
Play him loudly!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4B5zmDz4vR4
"I'm sorry Mickey, but I don't think the judge will grant you a divorce on the grounds that Minnie acts a little silly now and then..."
"I didn't say she was acting silly, I said that she's fucking Goofy!"
Reach in and grab the giblets.
Whew! Thats one terrific spread!
Im in the mood for a little dark meat.
Tying the legs together will keep the inside moist.
Talk about huge breasts!
And he forces his way into the end zone!
Shes 5000 pounds fully inflated and it takes 15 men to hold her down.
Its Cool Whip time!
If I dont unbuckle my pants, Im going to burst!
It must be broken, cause when I push on the tip, nothing squirts out.
It was called The Guac-ing Dead.
They slug it out!
A frog sandwich!
DRUNK AND ARTHRITIS
A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, ''Father, what causes arthritis?''
''Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man,'' the priest replied. ''Imagine that,'' the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologized: ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'' ''I don't have arthritis, Father,'' the drunk said, ''but I just read in the paper that the Pope does.'