"I have a great personal trainer. He got rid of a lot of my complaints. Want his number?"

Her complaint:
"I am a little overweight."

Duh, how's that trainer gonna fix the degenerating disks in my back?

She has a answer for that:
"You know exercise builds bone!!!!!"

I give up!

"Take two asprin and call me in the morning."

I'm having a horrible day so I'm pulling out the big guns...Aleve.

I really am having a very painful day....

I LOVE THIS THREAD, y'all are the bestest!!!

We can all be happy we are not in the military....

When my son has a migraine he is told to "drink water and do push-ups". Hugs

Lets see I got this one from my boyfriend but it may already be out there.
"Sometimes you just gotta suck it up and go to class because you can't just quit on life and it isn't that bad."
Or from my friendly doctor pulling aside my mom:
"Are you sure there is nothing going on with her, emotionally wise?"
"You aren't using your cane today you must be feeling so much better." (I am just 21 and not having to use a cane one day doesn't mean I am good).
"If you just left the room and got some fresh air I know you would feel so much better."
"Suppliment or pill X helped me out so much so you should try it I know it will make you all better."

"You still in pain you got to go to the doctor"

I never thought of that I will have to say something to the doctor since I see them every month just for good measure.

not every two weeks? Obviously you just need to come more often and being in their presence will heal you.
That's why my doctor used tell me to come back in two weeks if the pain continues while doing nothing to figure out why I was in pain or stop it.
O and at least my doctor knew the pain I have wasn't anything serious back when I first started having it because otherwise I would be dead by now. (pre 4 years ago Lyme Diagnosis).

Bahaha... Stop it u guys... Im laughing so hard im almost peeing...
I know I know... "Do kegal exercises"... Cus its probably just be that my bladder is weak... Couldnt hve anything to do with the cervical cancer or Lupus attacking my bladder...
HHHMMMM... (while scratching my head)

Oh WAIT you have CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"You do realize that keeping your spirits up and imagining that immune system will kill off those ltlle nasty cancers celss don't you?"

Lost trak of how many times mom told me that one while they kept choping out parts of her ravaged by the disease.

"Have you tried prayer? We have a great healing ministry at my church. I think they cured a brain tumor that was pressing on a woman's brain stem recently. She has terrible migraines. Now she is cured. You gotta come to the next one so we can pray over you."

Two months later:
"Well, you did not bother to come to the prayer session did you! If you are not going to even TRY, then stop complaining to me!"

Just don't know what's wrong with you people! You've been given good advice and you just won't take it.

You don't try!!! (Love that one!)

BTW.......what am I suppose to try? hmmmmm?

or for those who are currently trying something and people feel like they can't say you aren't even trying:
You're getting treatment for X disease and it should cure you. I don't know why you are still in so much pain and so negative sometimes. You should easily be able to do the things normal people do because you're getting treated for it.

Oh that is a good one. "I thought you went to the doctor already for that?"

Yep, go every month for the same disease. Docs aren't miracle workers ya know. They are really just making a really highly education guess.