Hi, I'm Patrick. I'm a compulsive liar. It's my first time on this group page. Just wanted to say hi to everyone who's suffering with this affliction and the damage it causes.

Hi, I'm Patrick. I'm a compulsive liar. It's my first time on this group page. Just wanted to say hi to everyone who's suffering with this affliction and the damage it causes.

Hi, I'm Patrick. I'm a compulsive liar. It's my first time on this group page. Just wanted to say hi to everyone who's suffering with this affliction and the damage it causes.

hhellooo! I'm Attallah and I am a...liar... It is my first day to join this site.. hhelloo!:)

hhellooo! I'm Attallah and I am a...liar... It is my first day to join this site.. hhelloo!:)

Hello, I'm Russ, and I'm a liar. I've been getting therapy, meditating, doing all the good work, and.. this isn't a disease that you can just cure. You have to make a conscious choice. All the chips are in. I have let les slip here and there, and while I'm much better than I was when I started this thread, I'm not perfect. The days muddle together. It's heart-warming to see how everyone's been on here so frequently, and it's awesome. You guys are amazing.

Hi Russ,

This is Day One for me to full admit I am a compulsive liar. If I do not get a grip on my addiction I am going to lose all that is important to me including losing myself. With my lies and impulsive acts I have squandered a fortune and now I am deep in debt and I was close to purchasing a home with my fiance recently and she looked clearly at my finances and realized I am not a safe and secure person and she is right. I lie to her about my true feelings which I do not know how to communicate so I hide behind stories and shucking and jiving as I call it. I want to rid myself of this problem before it ruins my life entirely. She is a Saint to support me through this though she has no intention of living with me any time soon. She has had it with me. I love her dearly but she no longer trusts me. I am currently in 12 Steps for Co-Dependency so I will add this addiction to those meetings unless I can find one that i specific to Liars like me!

The whole reason this group was started was for Liars like you and me. I was a liar for YEARS before I joined this group, and even though I've gone through therapy, prayer, everything I could think of, every now and then, things still slip by and I catch myself right in the thick of it. Don't ever give up, and you'll be okay. Blatant honesty, man. Blatant. And the knowledge that despite that, you're loved. Always loved.

Thanks Russ,

Name is Bill :) I am hungry to start today.......any ideas on readings, links, etc.?

I like the idea of BLATANT honesty......something I have never been very good at.

By the way my name REALLY IS BILL!!!

Thanks again

Hi Bill,

It's hard to find much material that directly relates to our issue short of a psychological text book. The best thing I've found to do is Cognative Behavioral Therapy. Get one of those little notepads that people put in their pocket. Every time you tell a lie, put a little tick mark in there. See how often you do it. Obviously, you want to try to stop, but that tick mark becomes a big deal. It makes you aware of the problem. It points out to you how bad it may be, and gives you a goal. It also makes you conscious of when you do it, so you can address it immediately. "Sorry babe, I was stuck in traffic", which would have been left alone, gets followed by "actually, I stopped off and got a pack of smokes and a rockstar on the way home. Traffic wasn't too bad."

Bill, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you Russ and thank you very much. I like the Mark Twain quote - "Always tell the truth, that way you don't have to remember what you said" - so so true

I will keep a tickler file in my wallet.

One of my biggest issues is when I get into discussions with my fiance I am not conscious of my lies and she she calls me on something I deny it and that ruins everything. She has been patient but is just about done with me.

My wife and I have been through the ringer, man. She's a recovering alcoholic/addict who's clinically bipolar, and I'm a compulsive liar. So between the two of us, it's a recipe for disaster. The key is communication, and what's helped me the most is when I start feeling anxious about anything (and I know you know when that point is), take a time out and really think about what you're going to say. Write it down if you have to. Write down what she says, too. It's like those Twix commercials, but you're buying time to tell the truth. For me, most of my deceit comes from a fear of confrontation and the desire to look better than I feel. The fear of confrontation takes up almost 99% of the bullshit, though. The irony is that lying about it usually makes it 100x harder to actually deal with and move past. When you really realize how easy it is to cope with adversity, the lies just melt away.

Hope that helps.

You have every idea how true that is for me! I get into conversations and I literally think I am crazy with a memory problem when I get called out. I started writing down a conversation the other day but it was too late. My fiance NEVER EVER lies about anything so I am really up against it but it is worth it. With work I sluff off and then back pedal that I know it all and I have been called out in the past and been laid off and I blame others for my demise. I am a ridiculous codependent and my fiance is a recovering codependent and she has burned by two horrible relationships. Today felt great - I called my boss and had an honest conversation with him about the importance of my job and I was honest with him about expectations. I also practiced being 100% honest with people with no exaggerations.

So glad we have met and I am sorry to hear about your wife though it sounds like you guys are working hard to win this game.

take a time out - so many times I wish I had done that.

We are doing fine now, but you probably know that ever day is a struggle, even the good ones. Just remind yourself that when things are great, there's still work to do, and when they suck, that you've already done so much.