laurabp

Today I got a postcard reminding me that I can order a Christmas wreath for my husband's grave, which I will do.  However, unlike last year when the thought was comforting, this year I am angry -...

Today marks 21 months since Stan died.  When I finished that first year, I was very surprised and disappointed to find that as I entered the second year, I went into even deeper loneliness and...

Overall, I am glad I joined this widow/widower support group.  I like to exchange ideas with people, and to compare differences in how we see things, solve problems, and in this case, grieve.  I...

I have spent the last 16 months stumbling around, trying to find what my life is supposed to be now that my husband is gone.  I was downsized about 6 months before he died, and then struggled...

Today as I was preparing to do laundry in the basement of my apartment building, I turned on my cell phone which I usually do, just in case I fall down the stairs, whatever, while I'm down in the...

I have finally figured out why people who have not lost their spouses expect us to "get over it" so fast; it is because they are in a different time zone.  At 15 months out from Stan's death, I did...

Tomorrow, March 20 is not just the first day of Spring.  It is the anniversary of the day Stan and I re-connected after a number of years of not having seen each other, and that chance meeting (or...

Well, here I am at 15 months out from the death of my husband, and feeling "in limbo".  I made it through the dreaded 1sts of the first year, felt like when I completed the one year anniversary that...

I thought I had totally run out of unemployment extensions and was really worrying about how I will survive until I turn 62 in ten months, hoping that my meager widows pension and savings will hold...

Having finally gotten through the dreaded 1 year mark on December 5th, I have found myself thinking a few random thoughts about my husband, my life, and the holiday season. 1)  I realize that I met...

As I was sorting through things recently during my move, I found this list that I had made before we were married in 1993.  It was in response to the question of why I loved Stan, and I find that...

I felt as if I was doing ok until in church when the young woman with the beautiful voice and the keyboard, and the young man with the guitar sang a beautiful song that I had never heard before about...

    I have been thinking a lot this week about the "alone but not lonely" thing that people often talk about, especially in light of the recent discussions posted on DS about re-marriage, and when...

Ok, I have to get this out of my system!  I am having a hard time with a lot of the widowed people brushing aside divorce as being painless.  They are appalled that divorced people would dare to...

Today was Stan's birthday and I made it!  I was SO depressed and upset for about a week before, due to a variety of things going on in my life, and I was dreading this day!  The last picture I have...