alantm
Status: just lost ...looked a lot..and no paths ..im lost
Mood:
Bad
Offline
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tonight im worried but cant really talkgoing to bed upset
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dont know what to think of myselfin someways im so much less.i was a mess before but was i more ?im so much less now.the i thing has been here from 2008now there is dedicationread back some of my old...
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About MeMember since June 01, 2008 i hate that ....so much shit
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today was busybut not greati did a bit of every thing and still felt i had reached nothingfoot to the floor going no where
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feeling isolated today i wanted to be lovedbut im notyes its also valentives dayand this day last year was greatthis year its the same fucking hole it normaly ismy casual date really is not making...
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my sort of ex is going to the grammysand i think is getting married ????? in 14 days ????? i dont tell anyone this stuff because no one i know beleives mewhat a sad situation to be inso fuck themi...
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going to bedfeeling alone...alone as in emotionaly alonei have physical ....but i am aloneso much more is missing
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car got crushed in the endfelt sorry for it
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ok im moderaly drunkbut its oki need to belife is such a messits very blank in factdrink softens it upi have work.i work a hell of a lotmy sort of part time date thingis slowly coming unstuckdistance...
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got mixed up with my agei was born 1969so i think im 42 this year ?i thought i was 43worked hard toady totally worn outand that was just to get ready for this week
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im worn out.im emotionaly screwed :(quite upset
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anxiety still aroundalways feel things are so un finisheddreams would take to long to explian..personal situation ...i am so lacking detph these days.i just cant see the point in trying to be ...even...
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still anxietyi tryed to shake it offby doing actionsi thought if i do everything that there is to do i will feel freeso i didi did all of them that i could ...the worste onesbut each one didnt leave...
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anxietyworriedeverything from death to money and loveanxiety
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Some deep down fearsfear of this life surface tonightage and death lots of emotional strings tugingfeelings of love are so far away
dd